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Wine List For The Apocalypse, Courtesy Of Your Olive Garden Sommelier

Let’s start with our splendid assortment of reds. First, we have our Merlot: soft and medium-bodied, with dark fruit flavors and the smoky undertones of a scorched planet littered with human carrion. You may also detect subtle hints of tree bark and shoe leather, which pairs nicely with chicken, veal, and any meat desperately gnawed from the desiccated corpses of household pets.

New Dating Rules For The Apocalypse

Have sex on the first date, actually, have sex the first ten minutes of the first date. You are going to die very soon.