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Humorist Podcasts

The Cartoon Pad: Trainwreck of Fun

‘Get Back,’ the episode the public has been hankering for. The boys are back to discuss art and the craft of gag cartooning but never do quite get to it. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.”

Humorist Books

Featuring humor novels, cartoon collections, children’s book parodies, and more!

Greg Maxwell’s Inferno:The Erotic, Judeo-Christian, Modern-Day Odyssey No One Asked For

by Keith James

Hell has come to claim the last mortal universe. A bleeding tower has burst through the 24-Hour Fitness parking lot. Demons circle the city of San Diego. One name is called to challenge Lucifer’s Champion: Greg Maxwell.

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Lyssa Strata: A Comedy for the Frustrated 

by Martti Nelson

A small-town librarian finds her voice and kicks some misogynist butt in the process. Inspired by the classical Greek comedy, Lysistrata, librarian Lyssa Strata has long begged the Town Council of Athena, Massachusetts to repeal its disgusting, old, misogynist, and racist laws, but the Council, an all-male entity for 400 years, has blown her off as a redheaded spinster—who, according to a 1673 law, should legally be run out of town at the end of a musket upon a poor fiscal year. When Lyssa seeks to invade the male bastion as the first woman ever on the Council, the men in charge treat her candidacy as a hilarious joke; that is, until Lyssa leads the women of the town on a sex strike.

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The Witch Demands a Retraction: Fairy Tale Reboots for Adults

by Melissa Balmain (Author), Ron Barrett (Illustrator)

Pinocchio Runs for Office, The Peeved Piper, Not So Snow White and so many more in this twisted collection of adult fairy tales!

This hilarious collection of poems by Melissa Balmain puts a grown-up, contemporary spin on the stories and characters we all learned as children, from Little Red Riding Hood, to the Three Bears, the Pied Piper, and Cinderella; each delightfully depicted in full-color by Ron Barrett, (Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs) one of the best and award winning illustrators in the business.

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Seven Easy Steps To Go To Hell

by Brandon Hicks

What you see is not always the whole picture, as you’ll learn on your journey to HELL!

Occupying the lowest rung on the demonic corporate ladder, Beezle, Buzzle, and Barb have the unenviable task of ensuring enough souls are going to Hell. Using their patented Seven Deadly Sins™ method, the trio explains how you can get yourself a one-way ticket.

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The # * % < ! + & Year in Review

by Ron Hauge

From Emmy® Award winner Ron Hauge (The Simpsons, Seinfeld, The Ren & Stimpy Show, In Living Color) comes ‘The # * % < ! + & Year In Review', a retrospective collection of single-panel, full-color cartoons selected from his popular Instagram account. The year 2020 will not soon be forgotten, but perhaps we can gain a little perspective with these biting, often outrageous illustrations lampooning Trump, the pandemic, social unrest, the whole mess. BUY NOW 

The Elements of Stress and the Pursuit of Happy-ish in this Current Sh*tstorm

by Bob Eckstein & Michael Shaw

THE ELEMENTS OF STRESS and the Pursuit of Happy-ish in this Current Sh*tstorm is a humorous handbook to help readers better deal with the challenges and headaches of our times, from overeating, to love problems, money woes, global warming, night sweats, winter itch, general anxiety, and so much more. Plus, over 70 stress-defusing cartoons from two of the best gag cartoonists

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Dumb Jokes For Smart Folks

by Jessica Delfino

Dumb Jokes For Smart Folks delivers a grown-up spin on the quintessential children’s joke book. Chock-full of silly wordplay and looney leaps in logic, this collection touches on a variety of topics and themes, from the great outdoors, to celebrities, outer space, and recreational cannabis. Perfect for readers who wish to reconnect with their inner-child or anyone who enjoys a good guffaw- or groan-worthy joke.

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A Gaslight in the Attic

by Matt Lassen

A Gaslight in the Attic is an expert satire of the Donald Trump presidency written from the perspective of the man himself! The book parodies the Shel Silverstein classic “A Light in the Attic” with original poems chronicling Trumpisms, his lies and contradictions and the classic “look this way so you don’t see that” gaslighting at its best! The over 70 hilarious original poems include original Shel Silverstein-esque pen and ink illustrations to enjoy along with it!

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A Gaslight in the Attic

by Matt Lassen

A Gaslight in the Attic is an expert satire of the Donald Trump presidency written from the perspective of the man himself! The book parodies the Shel Silverstein classic “A Light in the Attic” with original poems chronicling Trumpisms, his lies and contradictions and the classic “look this way so you don’t see that” gaslighting at its best! The over 70 hilarious original poems include original Shel Silverstein-esque pen and ink illustrations to enjoy along with it!

BUY NOW 

From the Campaign Trail or Thereabouts

by Michael Bleicher & Andy Newton

From the Campaign Trail or Thereabouts dives into the contradictory, divided, and all-too-often unsettling state of the union. Like Huck Finn meets Game Change, the novel examines the politicians and popular figures who played starring roles in 2016 and holds up a mirror to the electorate that ultimately made Trumpism possible.

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How Amusing

Read what all the fuss is about…

Other New Additions To Trump’s Bible

Several books in this version of the Bible are presented Mad Libs style. Many more bits featuring Jesus hanging out with prostitutes. The Ten Commandments now officially designated as “fake news”. And more!

Pros and Cons of Becoming a Vampire 

Pro: Will have a reason to start a gang and call ourselves “The Lost Girls.”

Con: Will have to keep explaining the connection to the 1987 film “The Lost Boys” featuring Kiefer Sutherland.

#SpringASpaceMovie

Allergies Not Included, Battlefield Earth Day, Tax Return of the Jedi, and more #SpringASpaceMovie on this week’s trending joke game!

Are My Symptoms Seasonal Allergies…Or?

Is it…Measles, Shingles, Bubonic Plague, Justinian Plague (making a comeback) Or more!

A Letter from Someone Who Wants to Keep a Confederate Statue Up Solely Because That’s Where He Lost His Virginity

Once ol’ General Jackson is no longer standing in the park, where will I point to when I want to recount to people the greatest night of my life? How will I explain to my son where his old man received his first ever sloppy toppy?

Your New iPhone with AiOS

The Health app becomes overly concerned about your well-being and starts diagnosing you with rare diseases based on your daily step count. And more!

News Briefs: Employees Of Weed Shop Keep Forgetting To Charge Customers

PLUS:
Shower Head Feels Weird About Relationship With Female Owner
Man Hides Liquor Bottle In Same Place He Used To Hide Ex-Wife’s Christmas Presents, Laptop Computer Not Crazy About Sitting On Man’s Crotch During Late Night Porno Surfing
Weekly Humorist News Briefs, Breaking News, Into Little Pieces.

How to Do the Monkey Bars as an Adult

In adulthood, the monkey bars become a rare and mythical concept. Like a unicorn, or a pickleback shot you don’t immediately regret. But if you’re like me, you’re either looking to recapture a shred of your childlike innocence, or you’re seeking revenge against Amelia, who beat you in the monkey bars contest in 3rd grade. Here are a few things you should consider.

#FartyFish

Northern Red Crapper, Halibutt, Barratoota, and more #FartyFish on this week’s trending joke game!

Everything I Remember

As I handle mementos around my house, they bring up recollections from many years ago. The movie-ticket stub that I found and fished out of a public garbage can. The program from a play that I found and fished out of a public garbage can. The public garbage can that I carried home in case anything else interesting was in there. Now I use it to store my mementos.

Conversations Between a Woman and the Dog She’s Unknowingly Dating on ‘Love Is Blind’

KELSIE R.: Babe! OMG that is so great you feel the same way! I’ve had no luck in the past and 100% of the guys I’ve dated have cheated on me. But you get me, and I know just by talking to you that you’d never stray. I’m getting loyal vibes! Maverick, I think–no I know–I’m falling in love with you. And you don’t have to say it back. I know it’s soon. [MAVERICK lifts his leg and pees in a plant.]

AITA for Creating a Universe Without Any Proof of My Existence and Then Punishing People for All Eternity if They Don’t Believe In Me?

My son (32M) and I have been arguing about this for ages. He says it’s unfair of me to require total unwavering belief without offering the slightest shred of evidence that I exist. I say he needs to stop blaming ME for other people’s suffering, despite the fact that I control the past, present, and future, that my will is all-encompassing, and that my plan cannot be deviated from.  

The Inner Monologue of a Cyclist in a City

What is with the bike bell being a faint trill? Why don’t bikes have louder horns? Bicycles are already small enough! How is a bus going to hear me if I’m coming? Who decided to give bigger vehicles bigger horns? Shouldn’t smaller vehicles have the louder horns? If people can’t see us coming, at least they can hear us. Who makes these decisions? How do I find them? It’s like nobody really cares about us cyclists.

This New York City Apartment Is Perfect. The Only Drawback Is the Coat Closet That’s a Direct Portal to the Ninth Circle of Hell

Tom is a spirit with bat wings and a tail, condemned to a cell that just so happens to be 12-stories directly below this Park Slope apartment’s coat closet. Tom is eternally on fire. He is also the love of my life.

GOPlayer One Go!

CPAC-Man: You're CPAC-Man, darting around the maze-like corridors of CPAC, gobbling up donor funds and seedy political favors while also trying to avoid Nazis who have made themselves cozy at the convention.    Keep an eye out for those guys, they're sneaky; before you know it photos of you standing right next to a Nazi salute could be a trending story on MSNBC, which could end your game!    Ah, who're we kidding?   No one on the conservative side will care about that kind of thing anyway.   This game has endless lives.

Tips for Eating Out

Making Healthy Choices: DO order your salad dressing on the side / DON’T order your salad dressing in a bowl with a straw

Children’s Programming For Drugged Out Parents

The Flintstoned, Sesame Tweak, Barney the Purple Haze Dinosaur, and more!

Soaring Surge Pricing That We Don’t Want to See

When you hit the last few pages of that best-selling mystery that you’ve downloaded to your Kindle. And more!

#BreakfastABook

Anne of Green Bagels, Griddle Women, 50 Shades of Gravy, and more #BreakfastABook on this week's trending joke game!

Other Oxymoronic Wellness Regimens to Add to Your ‘Power Nap’ 

Beer Yoga: Nothing wrong with a little hair of the downward dog. You risk getting too woo-woo at these spiritual thingies unless you bring a couple cold Bud Lights to bring you back down to your Midwestern roots. Plus, the booze will deffo give you the extra confidence boost to hit that headstand at the end of class while all the other losers are laying down for that dumb sleeping part. If you can’t find a Beer Yoga class listed in your area, you can always bring a forty in a brown bag to the free park yoga class nearest you. I don’t see why everyone wouldn’t be chill with that.

At Netflix, We’re Taking Product Placement to the Next Level with New Film’s All-Beverage Cast

Dunkin’ Iced Coffee:  Quippy tech guru PRIME Energy: Sadistic but easily dispatched henchman La Croix (Pamplemousse flavor):  Self-conscious artist making film within a film, and more!

Laffy Taffy Jokes For Adults

Why did the fisherman's wife whittle his oar into a realistic shaped dildo? She wanted to finally have an oar-gasm!

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CARTOON: Winged Woes

Airborne Troubles. Today's cartoon by Thomas Wykes.

CARTOON: Sniffing for Savings

Scented Shenanigans. Today's cartoon by Nathan Cooper.

Other New Additions To Trump's Bible

Several books in this version of the Bible are presented Mad Libs style. Many more bits featuring Jesus hanging out with prostitutes. The Ten Commandments now officially designated as "fake news". And more!

CARTOON: Messy Masterpiece

Chromatic Confusion. Today's cartoon by Michael Shaw.

Pros and Cons of Becoming a Vampire 

Pro: Will have a reason to start a gang and call ourselves “The Lost Girls.” Con: Will have to keep explaining the connection to the 1987 film “The Lost Boys” featuring Kiefer Sutherland.

#SpringASpaceMovie

Allergies Not Included, Battlefield Earth Day, Tax Return of the Jedi, and more #SpringASpaceMovie on this week's trending joke game!

Are My Symptoms Seasonal Allergies…Or?

Is it...Measles, Shingles, Bubonic Plague, Justinian Plague (making a comeback) Or more!

A Letter from Someone Who Wants to Keep a Confederate Statue Up Solely Because That’s Where He Lost His Virginity

Once ol’ General Jackson is no longer standing in the park, where will I point to when I want to recount to people the greatest night of my life? How will I explain to my son where his old man received his first ever sloppy toppy?

Your New iPhone with AiOS

The Health app becomes overly concerned about your well-being and starts diagnosing you with rare diseases based on your daily step count. And more!