True, a trillion dollars can still cover many of your daily expenses. But a single global depression could knock your net worth down to say, $850 billion. Sending you diving into your kitchen’s coupon drawer for 50% off and BOGO offers.

SKIPPER: People have been hurt so badly by radical left lunatics that worked for the Howell administration.  They’re vicious. They raided my hut, took my coconuts, and all the other things. They’ve lost everything over a fake weaponization of government. 

Me, I’ve never been a quitter. But at 36 years old and with no history of playing competitive basketball, it’s dawning on me that there’s a real chance that I’ll never play in the NBA.

I’m thrilled to present The Nobster Bib!  It’s like a lobster bib, but also for when it’s Not Lobster!  I got the idea when I was at the Olive Garden’s “All the Pasta You Can Stuff into Your Face” festival.  Let me tell you, the marinara was flying that night!

According to science, the answer is “yes”.

If a tree falls in the forest, it would invariably emit sound waves even if no one is around to hear them. So, yay! You are a living breathing human being with a body and a desperate need of attention.

But, according to the blogosphere, the answer is a resounding “no”. You do not exist. Not where it matters most — on the interwebs.

What a conundrum — to simultaneously exist and not exist. Like Schrödinger’s cat. You’re both alive and dead at the same time.