An investigation is still pending, but McDonald’s Shamrock Shakes are made by Union-supported seasonal work leprechauns. They are allowed several Union-approved “stick-fights” throughout the day, during which they beat the corned beef out of each other with their shillelaghs, while standing on a plank placed over the Shamrock Shake vat. The loser of said match is thrown into the vat with their shillelagh and ground up into the Shamrock Shake.