Tag Archive for: Pete Hegseth

When We Bombed Iran, We Totally 100% Meant to Make Oil More Expensive
When we bombed Iran, we totally 100% planned to make oil more expensive, thereby allowing more Russian oil to enter the market, so Putin can further bomb Ukraine. We encourage everyone everywhere to bomb their way to peace.

Pete Hegseth Calls Together GI Joe
As you have no doubt noticed, our country is going through big changes, because as you all know, sometimes the smallest pricks can cast the longest shadows. And today, that shadow is President Donald Trump. I’m sorry, I may still be a little drunk.

Pentagon Announces New Military Emoji Code
Oops, Wrong Button: When you accidentally target a hospital instead of a military base.
