Elsa Nierenberg – Weekly Humorist

About Elsa Nierenberg

Elsa Nierenberg is a stand-up comedian, comedic writer, and student at Bryn Mawr College. You can find more of her writing online at Little Old Lady Comedy, The Belladonna, WICF Daily and others. She performs stand-up throughout Boston and Philadelphia. Follow her on twitter @ElsaNierenberg

Entries by Elsa Nierenberg

Originals

Sexting Before Texting: PBS Explores The History of Erotic Communication

by Elsa Nierenberg
August 8, 2019

In the renaissance period, the European upper class would often commission nude portraits to be painted and hung in their master bedrooms. The process took a brisk two to four years to complete. Today, in a matter of moments after snapping a photo of your pale, awkward torso-to-thighs region, you can get a text from your great-grandmother saying, “I didn’t survive the Holocaust to see this”! Isn’t technology amazing?

Originals

How To Succeed In Your Work Retreat Ice Breaker Games At Lake Manuwaka

by Elsa Nierenberg
July 16, 2019

Before we dive into our fun-packed rigid weekend itinerary –complete with SEVERAL trust-building exercises and virtually hundreds of opportunities to see the entire accounting team awkwardly wade into GORGEOUS lake Manuwaka in their saggy one-piece bathing suits—we’re going to start out with some fun, high energy ice breaker activities. So, leave your unmarked backpacks full of your business casual attire and valuables in that pile by the shore and come join us in the circle!

originals

Julia Child’s Hangover Cure Recipes

by Elsa Nierenberg
June 28, 2019

By the time you piece together the hazy events of last night, you, my dear, will realize that you are in fact the tart in this simple French dish. To “flambé” your tarte, simply add a generous pour of any liqueur of your choice –bypassing the use of a blow torch or flame of any kind—and voila!

Originals

I’m Benjamin Button and This is My Skincare Routine

by Elsa Nierenberg
June 7, 2019

If you’re one of the select few, like me, who are unable to age in an appropriate direction, you’re going to want to get in on this ASAP. Using a gentle apricot-pit infused facial exfoliant or a fruit peel, scrub off all of your layers of tired, older skin to reveal a younger, more vibrant new you! This worked wonders for me, so I really have no idea why it’s not doing the same for you. Uh, scrub harder, maybe?