Originals
Cap’n Crunch’s Most Irritating Pet Peeves
People on the street who ask if he’s a member of The Village People.
Social media bullying from those horrible Honeycomb Kids.
Due to Cialis / Viagra allergies, not able to “stay crispy in milk” anymore, if you know what we mean.
Despite being a fan of Trump, agitated by people who stormed the Capital while wearing costumes very similar to his military uniform.
That Trix rabbit, who is far more popular a cereal mascot, despite clearly being a pervert. I mean, have you seen those commercials?! He’s obviously trying to lure those kids with that damned delicious cereal!!
No one ever takes him seriously when he asks them to walk the plank.
During his yearly physical for the Quaker Oats company, the attending doctor always asks to see his “crunch-berries” before asking him to cough.
The constant calls and accusations from reporters since the discovery of several of his mustache hairs at the Spahn Ranch Charles Manson compound. Like he’s said hundreds of times already, they were casual friends long before all of the kooky cult stuff.
Pirates making fun of him for having both eyes.
Chloe Kardashian’s stalking claims blown way out of proportion by the media.
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Kit has been a regular contributor to MAD magazine for over ten years, and has also been regularly published by National Lampoon, Playboy, The American Bystander, Funny Or Die, SpongeBob Squarepants Comics, Points In Case and many others. His work has been called “sort of like ‘The Far Side’, but more offbeat and often much funnier” by people who should clearly know better. He lives with his wife and two dogs, all of whom do their best to tolerate his presence