Tag Archive for: Pete Hegseth​​

Who Said It: Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth or a Samuel L. Jackson Character?

“No more beardos!” “I never did one thing right in my life, you know that? Not one. That takes skill.” “Mankind is the virus, and I am the cure.” And more!

When We Bombed Iran, We Totally 100% Meant to Make Oil More Expensive

When we bombed Iran, we totally 100% planned to make oil more expensive, thereby allowing more Russian oil to enter the market, so Putin can further bomb Ukraine. We encourage everyone everywhere to bomb their way to peace.

Pete Hegseth Calls Together GI Joe

As you have no doubt noticed, our country is going through big changes, because as you all know, sometimes the smallest pricks can cast the longest shadows.  And today, that shadow is President Donald Trump.   I’m sorry, I may still be a little drunk.

Pentagon Announces New Military Emoji Code

 Oops, Wrong Button: When you accidentally target a hospital instead of a military base.