Tag Archive for: subscriber

I’m Locked in My Neighbor’s Basement and Can’t Leave Till You Subscribe to This Kid’s Substack

But let me ask you this in return: Is $4.99 really too much to spend on freedom (of speech)? Hasn’t your literary tastes been missing an essential frame in the proverbial (and non-existent) Goodfellas film reel that is your Substack subscriptions?

Please Don’t Ignore Our Brief Survey About Your Customer Care Experience

Dear Valued Customer: We received your request to opt out of our surveys. No worries! Most of our valued customers ask to opt out, often dozens of times. Rest assured, we’re just as bad at processing opt-outs as we are at refunding your money. Thanks! Your friends on the Customer Care Team