Posts

As a Passenger on the Titanic, I’m So Glad We All Decided to Go On With Our Lives as the Ship Sinks

It’s hard to admit it now, but I was a tad hysterical at first wondering if I could get a spot in one of those lifeboats. I even tried to jump the queue. But then I heard that it was better to let your lungs get used to drowning the natural way, by desperately gulping for air underwater, and I thought, that makes sense!

CARTOON: Sign of the Times

Body language. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

Ms. Bauer’s 5th Grade School Supply List (and Coping Mechanism) for 2021–2022

72 No. 2 Pencils (latex-free): These MUST be pre-sharpened. We’ve lost so much instruction time since March 2020 that we simply cannot waste precious minutes of the school day using the pencil sharpener. (Your kids will probably bring most of these home at the end of the year, unused.)

Alternative Uses for Your Masks Once the Pandemic is Over

Hamster Hammock, Tiny Purse, Water Balloon Sling, and more in this illustrated list.

Reasons I'm Still Wearing A Mask (That Have Nothing to Do With Secretly Being a Crocodile)

I fear someday soon I will be all alone in my stalwart masking. I wear a mask to protect others—not to obscure a hypothetical snout full of sharp teeth that I might, hypothetically, have and might, hypothetically, intend to eat you with.

CARTOON: CDC Mandates

Not everything is dropped. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Singin' in the Germs!

What a glorious feeling! Today's cartoon by Ward Sutton.

CARTOON: Maskless

Masks off, pants off. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: BC: Before Covid

Reach across the aisle? Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

Errands I'm Going to Run While I Wait for My Covid Test Results

On my way back from the gym, I’ll quickly pop into the grocery store, butcher, fish shop, bakery, a nail salon, and a real estate office to see about taking some apartment tours in the next few days. Rent prices are actually pretty good right now for some reason, so I’m going to set up 7-9 tours for the next few days. Want to get them done in case I actually do have Covid, haha (unlikely, I’ve been so careful, especially when I was in Mexico).

CARTOON: Cast Them Out

This might take a while. Today's cartoon by Dan Misdea.

CARTOON: Away!

He's rounding the corner! Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Halloween Masks

Be super, mask up. Today's cartoon by Dalton Vaughn.

CARTOON: Elephant in the Room

The elephant in the room. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

Ways Jane Austen Heroines Deal With the Men They Love or Ways I Deal With People Who Won't Wear Masks During a Pandemic 

Go on lots of walks alone in the woods. Swear immovable hatred for them to no one in particular. Keep a detailed, running tally of their offenses in a diary. And more.

What the Location of Your Anti-Mask Tirade Says About You

Sur La Table — Your kids go to a school that used to be a rich person’s house. Target — You purchased a brand of dryer sheets because others were boycotting it. And more!

CARTOON: Lemmings

Freedoom. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

Plagueboy Magazine

This Month’s PlagueMate Will Have You Rising Quicker Than Current Virus Cases!

Star Wars if All The Bad Guys Refused to Wear Their Masks

Onboard the Death Star, Luke Skywalker and Han Solo try to disguise themselves as Stormtroopers. Everyone recognizes them immediately because Stormtroopers don’t wear masks.

CARTOON: Inspection

Looks perfect here, masks not required. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Summer 2020 Poolside Styles

Don't forget to floss! Today's cartoon by David Ostow.

CARTOON: Fashion Watch

Going somewhere? Can you imagine? Today's cartoon by Brandon Hicks.

Rejected 'Halloween' Masks

Did you know that Micheal Myers’ original mask from “Halloween” was actually just a Captain Kirk mask painted white? Believe it or not, Kirk was not the only iconic television star of the day to be considered.