The 2024 University of Phoenix Valedictorian Speech, Presented By Draft Kings

My heart is full today as I look out and see hundreds of familiar usernames. I’m honored to have the opportunity to celebrate this milestone with you all. I am excited for us to leave this Zoom meeting with our heads held high, knowing that we are the next generation of thinkers and doers. 

Sex With Me, Sponsored By Brooklinen

Wow, that was great! You know what they say about seven minutes in heaven: you can do it in four. Let me just throw this condom away. And speaking of away, Away Luggage is quickly becoming the most trusted suitcase brand from young professionals on the go. Not saying you have to go! You can totally stay the night if you want.

When Advertisers Set Their Sites On Beloved Children's Literature Classics

Love You Forever 21, Oil Of Olay Wrinkle Cream In Time, and more!