Alabama: At Least We’re Not Mississippi and 23 Other REAL State Mottos
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Texas: The Lone Star Stands For Our Yelp Review
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New Hampshire: Live free or Die: Pick one
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Pennsylvania: You’ve Got a Friend in Pennsy….no you don’t
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Arizona: We Love our God, We Love Our Guns. Papers?
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Alaska: See Russia from Your House
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North Dakota: Hey, at least we have Mount Rushmore-wait a min. We got nothing.
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California: The Tent State
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New York: NYC and Whatever
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Florida: Come for the Keys, Stay for the COVID
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Alabama: At Least We’re Not Mississippi
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New Jersey. The Olive Garden State
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Colorado: The Everyone’s a Mile High State
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Mississippi: Rich in history, poor in GDP
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Maine: Maniacs, Maine Liners, and Mainly Freezing Our Asses Off
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Florida: The It’s a Small Minded World After All, After All, State
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Hawaii: The Kenya Adjacent State
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Louisiana: The State of High Cholesterol
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Missouri: Missouri Loves Company
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Michigan: We Were a Pretty Big Deal in 1961
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Nevada: What happens in Nevada stays in Nevada Especially That Money You Gambled
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Florida: The It’s a Small Minded World After Al, After All State
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Washington DC: Justice for All (Enforced by the Maryland National Guard)
- About the Author
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Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of — winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending, Congolese gynecologist, Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney’s, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog, Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that’s been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul’s time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar…
- About the Author
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Matthew Clark is a writer, producer, and podcaster. He has written several full-feature scripts, including 2009’s Rodeo Driver which was nominated for Best Screenplay at the 2011 Beverly Hills Film Festival, and The Comedian, which was nominated at the Rome Prisma Independent Film Awards. His 2024 script, Made in Philadelphia, has received numerous awards and accolades in the film festival and screenwriting competition circuit, including Best Feature Screenplay at the 2024 Los Angeles Film Awards, 2024 LA Under the Stars Film Festival, 2024 New Jersey Film Awards, and more.
He is currently a writer and producer with Paul Lander for the comedy series “Pretty Damn Sketch,” which features the “5,4,3,2,1” comedy series.
He lives in Los Angeles with his wife Jennifer, and their menagerie of animals.
