Entries by James Folta


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A Revised Nightly Prayer

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray Bob Mueller my country to keep. That he finds lots of evidence, and he finds it promptly, So we can clean up the White House that Trump’s made so swampy. Should Russian bots again come for my vote, I pray Congress has found the antidote, And […]

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Trump Speech-O-Matic

Many people wonder why the things President Trump says seem so random, or unwritten, or even nonsensical, as if no human could ever conceive of writing them, that’s because they weren’t written by a human at all — a computer program created them. Many Americans are unaware that President Trump’s speeches are not written by […]

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List for the White House Handyman

We were able to obtain a copy of the list of requests and fixes from the White House crew and are sharing it here, a Weekly Humorist, exclusive. Dear repair crew, Please find enclosed a list of all necessary fixes to the White House. Please send all expense reports to: Sec. Tom Price Back of […]

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Recent Cases of iPhone Damage in the Current Political Environment

Repair Ticket #2948528 Phone smashed against wall after aunt wouldn’t stop posting long-winded, taunting comments on social media posts. Repair Ticket #8888654 Screen cracked from a forceful drop when user discovered she had accidentally opened Breitbart.com. Repair Ticket #1606442 Phone’s microphone burned out from repeated, shouting phone calls with Senators and other representatives. Repair Ticket […]