Entries by Steve Kerper


Little Red Riding Hood

It took Little Red Riding Hood all of five seconds to get over her grandmother’s death. And, unknown to the Wolf, Little Red Riding Hood had the super-human strength of ten giant hamsters and quickly subdued him.


Letters To Santa

When Santa writes back it’s not always cheery.


Goldilocks and the Pineapple Train Wreck

Once upon a time, there was a little girl who had golden, curly hair and she was called Goldilocks. One day she went for a walk in the woods. She came upon a cottage and knocked, but no one was home. She went in and saw a table with three chairs: a big chair, a […]


Notes to Melville (Starbuck’s)

There in a stark New England room is Herman Melville: white hair, white beard, dressed in 1850s attire, with that ever-present stern look on his face. 

The door bursts open and two network executives stride in. AMANDA, age 30, is attractive and high-powered. Trailing behind her is SIMON, late-20s, tall, thin, and well-groomed. Amanda Mel, […]


NOTES TO EINSTEIN (Everything is Relative)

What if Einstein’s theory of relativity got notes from TV execs, as if it was a sitcom script?   In what would look like a scientist’s office, there sits ALBERT EINSTEIN: advanced in age, slightly disheveled, with wild grey hair at work at his desk. There are several blackboards with equations scribbled all over them, […]