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CARTOON: Remote Revolution
Colonial Telecommute. Today's cartoon by Sara Harvey-Patrick.
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Joey Chestnut’s Yelp Review of Nathan’s Famous, Coney Island, July 5
Normally, I dip my hot dogs into a big bucket of water so that the buns are thoroughly soaked when I eat them. Today, no buckets. I had to buy a bottle of water. A guy saw me pouring my water out all over my second hot dog and he said “there’s mustard over there, you know.” I don’t know where the dude was from, but literally nobody puts mustard on hot dogs in America. It makes it so much harder to eat. Who has time for that, anyway?
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Your Dog's Guide To A Safe And Happy Fourth Of July, by Your Dog
Fireworks, right? Ugh. Who needs 'em? Look, I haven't forgotten about the incident with the rug last year, and I know that your mate hasn't allowed you to forget either. No one wants a repeat of that.
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CARTOON: Everybody Wins
Feel the burn! Today's cartoon by Drew Panckeri.
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Please Stand When You See Me In My American Flag Speedo At the Pool This Weekend Otherwise You are Disrespecting the Troops
So when I walk by you – whether on my way to the diving board to do another cannonball or on my way to the snack shack to get some Freedom fries – you will stand and respect the flag.
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I Am Nathan’s Hot Dog #75 and I Pray That Joey Chestnut’s Stomach Is Slowing Down
The spotlight might give my love life a boost. After all, there is no better way to let all the single snacks out there know that I am available than not getting eaten on ESPN. Have I mentioned that I always use a condiment?
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CARTOON: Half Mast
Can't get it up? You are not alone. Happy 4th of July! Today's cartoon by Kit Lively and David DeGrand.
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