The Art of the Memoir by Donald J. Trump

Chapter 3- Growing Up: My Dad was a Nazi, and if you’d asked me when I was a boy if that would help me relate to people, I’d have said “no.” But, as it turns out, “yes.”

What to Do When Your Screaming Autocrat Won’t Leave the White House

Offer a choice. This will make him feel like he has some say in the matter, even though he doesn’t. “On the way home, do you want us to keep counting the votes in Pennsylvania or stop counting them?”

Other Methods Of Keeping Trump In Line At The Debate

Stagehand frantically waving a double quarter-pounder with cheese from off camera if he begins to go on a maniacal tirade. Superglue Chapstick. Ejector seat / catapult. And more!

CARTOON: Trump Sippy Cup

Didn't you notice the happy meals? All for him! Today's cartoon by Paul Lander and Dan McConnnell.

CARTOON: Trump Stump For Ted Cruz

Nothing like getting endorsed by such a great pal! Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers!

CARTOON: Just Checking

Toss in a casino while you're at it. Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

One Weird Day in the Trump White House

Author’s Note: As your intrepid White House correspondent…

Trump’s First State of the Union

“I don’t really like cheeseburgers. It’s fake news. I’m losing weight and am down to 175 pounds, clearly you can see that.”

Bucket List for When You Think You Have 38 Minutes to Live Before a Ballistic Missile Strikes

Try to pull a tablecloth from underneath a set of dishes. Take…

Trump's New Rules

Meanwhile, in Donald Trump’s White House… Meeting in…

Trump Cursing

Winter is Trumping. via Youtube user Huw Parkinson

Trump Snarls

Two hours after his latest victory sort-of-speech following a…

Winter is Trumping

Winter is Trumping. via Youtube user Huw Parkinson

Tip-Top Tips to Terminate a Trumper Tantrum

The world can be a scary place even without Donald Trump around.…