Donkey Kong's Daily Planner

11:45 PM-   Meet up with Mario in the world of Grand Theft Auto for our monthly night of meth and hookers.

Truly Terrible Congressional Cost Cutting Measures

Less expensive prostitutes for out-of- town conferences. Congress looking into ways of potentially harvesting the energy created by massive book burnings. And more!

Trump’s Golden Intelligence Briefing

Thank you for meeting with us today, Mr. President-elect. We…


[Prostitutional Premonitions] Aries (March 21- April 19) You…