Tag Archive for: spring

Abbott and Costello Discuss Major League Baseball’s Revised Diversity Pipeline Program

Costello: Say I want to write a memo about MLB’s new diversity pipeline program. I write a memo to Who, that gets forwarded to What, and it’s about I Don’t Know. Who’s in the program now? Nobody. When can someone apply? Eventually. Why? He’s our lawyer.

The Rites of Spring (Cleaning)

Spring cleaning is an ancient tradition, dating back to when cave dwellers first realized that last season’s mammoth bones were starting to attract wolves. Today, the ritual persists, but with more existential dread and fewer saber-toothed tigers.

CARTOON: Picnic Panic

Buzzing Intruders. Today's cartoon by Drew Panckeri.

Are My Symptoms Seasonal Allergies…Or?

Is it...Measles, Shingles, Bubonic Plague, Justinian Plague (making a comeback) Or more!

CARTOON: Melting Gains

Freeze your assets. Today's cartoon by Chris Gural.

CARTOON: Sun Fun

Photosynthesis and a water please. Today's cartoon by Tyson Cole.

We Are Flowers, and We’re Here to Melt Your Fucking Face Off

Are you ready for this, my barren rock garden babies? Can you handle it? Well, then let’s go! Shrink your goddamn pupils, mother fuckers -- these savage hues are going to char your cones.

CARTOON: Bloomed

Thriving without us. Today's cartoon by Hilary Allison.

Honest Spring Cleaning Intentions

Rearrange the refrigerator magnets by size, then by color, and then by how they were before. Start “clean eating” (eating onion rings on a clean plate). And more.

CARTOON: Hold On Tight!

Don't get carried away! Today's cartoon by Mike Shiell.

How to Make Baseball More Exciting

Instead of having managers wear the team’s uniform, make them only wear leather. Raise the pitcher’s mound by 10 feet. And more.

CARTOON: Snowman Baseball

We need to bring the heat. Opening day cartoon by Bob Eckstein.

#SillySpringSlogans

April showers bring Mueller flowers, Sneeze the Day and more #SillySpringSlogans!

CARTOON: Lobster Party

CARTOON: Winter vs. Spring

Cutting Edge Gardening Tips

Fire-ant mounds do admittedly appear similar to chocolate lava…