Disney Unveils Plot For New “Reedy Creek Improvement District” Princess Movie

“Escalating his culture war with the Walt Disney Co., Republican Gov. Ron DeSantis expanded the special session of the Legislature that started Tuesday to consider eliminating the Reedy Creek Improvement District that independently governs much of Walt Disney World.” – Orlando Sentinel, April 19, 2022.

 

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Our story begins with a princess who lives in a faraway land ruled by a benevolent corporation. This princess, Creekerella, is beautiful, kind, and serves on the Board of Supervisors in her kingdom: The Reedy Creek Improvement District.

Everything is perfect for Creekerella. She sings acapella in the streets of Magic Kingdom during the day, and dances with lions in Animal Kingdom at night. There are no tedious government building codes in the district, so Creekerella literally lives inside the Epcot ball ride, Spaceship Earth.

The kingdom has its own jolly municipal employees who help with whatever Creekerella needs from putting out fires to filling potholes to brushing her luscious, long blond hair.

Everything runs smoothly in The Reedy Creek Improvement District and absolutely nothing needs to change. But then one day, an evil Fairy King appears. Fairy King DeSantis is jealous of Creekerella’s undeniable wokeness.

You see Creekerella recently stood behind a group of marginalized people who Fairy King DeSantis was trying to smite. Officially, Creekerella, The Reedy Creek Improvement District, and the Walt Disney Co always support marginalized people. Sometimes they just take a little time to assess the financial and political fallback, as is good business.

Anyway, this stand infuriated Fairy King DeSantis, who fears the woke attitude of the princess is poisoning the minds of children everywhere. So he lashes out, and puts a curse on an emergency legislative session to DESTROY The Reedy Creek Improvement District.

Without her tax haven kingdom, Creekerella would crumble under the sheer weight of the fees. Her beloved municipal employees would disappear, and her land would be invaded by the most insidious types of creatures: random government employees who don’t work for Disney.

Princess Creekerella starts growing more anxious by the day. She loses her incredible singing voice, her blond hair turns gray, and she starts to wilt away.

The only way to save Creekerella is by defeating the evil Fairy King DeSantis. But will enough concerned citizens call their representatives to put a stop to the bill? Or will they sit back and let Creekerella and her kingdom collapse?

Find out when Creekerella: The Rise and Fall (?) of A Beloved Kingdom premieres on Disney+ next month.