Hellmark Holiday Movie Channel

Introducing the one and only Hellmark Holiday Movie Channel, where your festive spirit meets its frightful match! Say goodbye to the warm fuzzies and hello to the chills and thrills because we’re decking the halls with bowels of horror. That’s right, we’ve taken your beloved holiday classics and mashed them up with horror icons to create a viewing experience that’s more jingle hells than jingle bells.

So, put on your ugly Christmas sweater, grab some gingerdead cookies, and cozy up by the fire (but keep an eye on the chimney, you never know who might come down). Welcome to the Hellmark Holiday Movie Channel – putting the ‘fear’ back into holiday cheer!

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The Purge: Black Friday

When the US government signs into legislation a 24 hour period of legal violence, they find the easiest transition would be to set the event on Black Friday.

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A Nightmare On 34th St

Fearing that he will flicker out of existence soon, Freddy enlists the aid of the little girl and the lawyer who proved that Santa was real in Miracle On 34th St.   Includes the notorious scene where Freddy invades Santa’s dreamscape and forces him to watch his mother playing with herself.

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I Know What You Did, Last Christmas

Terrifying holiday tale of betrayal and revenge,  during which last Christmas, you gave me your heart.  The very next day, you gave it away.   This set of events sets in motion a maniac’s thirst for vengeance when he can’t turn on a radio station after September that isn’t playing fucking Christmas music 24/ 7.

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Donner Of The Dead

Rudolph and Vixen are in for a seasonal siege when Donner and his cronies become infected with a zombie virus that causes them to foster a fervent lust for BRAINdeer.

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Candycaneman

Susan is burnt out on dating apps, so when she stumbles onto ancient lore concerning a holiday hunk called Candycaneman, she happily says his name three times into a snow globe from Spencer Gifts in order to soothe her holiday blues.

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Silent Night Of The Lambs

Following a particularly tough case, FBI wunderkind Clarice Starling unwinds by visiting the asylum for Christmas Eve dinner with friendly acquaintance Hannibal “The Cannibal” Lecter.   Careful Clarice, those aren’t sweet potatoes!

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PolterChrist

When Gerald and Kimber decide to stay at a fancy bed and breakfast for Christmas, Jesus comes back again, this time as a violent poltergeist intent on turning their festive holiday into an endurance test of pure terror.   When you’ve created all of the universe and it’s inhabitants, you can pretty much fuck with them randomly whenever you feel like it, apparently.