Other Odd Side Effects Of Popular Drugs
Claritin– Hated of children and small, cute animals.
Xanax– Tendency to become slightly agitated upon hearing straight white women talking like the contestants on RuPaul’s Drag Race.
Lipitor– Feelings easily hurt by morning talk show banter.
Cipro– Strong desire to punch people playing hacky sack.
Zoloft– Intense, passionate dislike of parades that prominently feature women in sparkly gold outfits doing the hula hoop.
Nexium– Uncontrollable yodeling while in the presence of Danish royalty.
Plavix– Phantom skin-tag syndrome (ie, suddenly feeling the absence of the dozens of skin tags that you’ve clipped off with small scissors while in the shower).
Valium– The irresistible desire to throw yourself down the stairs upon hearing Robert Wagner’s voice.
Prilosec– Affinity for giving anal bleaching treatments to kitchen employees of the Cheesecake Factory restaurant.
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Kit has been a regular contributor to MAD magazine for over ten years, and has also been regularly published by National Lampoon, Playboy, The American Bystander, Funny Or Die, SpongeBob Squarepants Comics, Points In Case and many others. His work has been called “sort of like ‘The Far Side’, but more offbeat and often much funnier” by people who should clearly know better. He lives with his wife and two dogs, all of whom do their best to tolerate his presence
