I’m Bombarding You With Texts Before Election Day So You’ll Definitely Vote for Me

9:32 AM — Hi! I’m your state’s Republican candidate for Governor. I got your number from some voter registry list. Can I count on your support this Election Day? I’m texting you because I don’t trust the polls and figure if I slide into your phone without consent, you’ll definitely vote for me. 9:33 AM —If you want to opt out of these messages reply “STOP” and I’ll continue sending them to you.

Flies the Democratic Candidates Are Dropping Like

Flies who could have been a great candidate and now everyone kind of regrets ignoring them.

Hollywood-Written Democratic Primary Call Scripts

Mayor Pete: Oof, wow! Mayor Pete? Why would I want a President who looks like a ventriloquist doll and a serial killer had a baby, am I right?!?

EXCLUSIVE BOOK EXCERPT: 'From the Campaign Trail or Thereabouts' ~ Buy It Today!

First chapter excerpt of the new political satire novel 'From the Campaign Trail or Thereabouts'. Now available from Humorist Books!

Presidential Candidates Running On A Platform of Basically Just Charisma

A Man Who Just Rolled Up His Sleeves 2020, A Stranger in a Leather Jacket We Haven’t Seen Around Town Before 2020 and more.

CARTOON: Biden 2020

A strong whiff for Washington. Today's cartoon by Bob Eckstein.

A Stalker Murders Me (A Story Composed from Presidential Campaign Fundraising Emails)

I am frustrated and angry today This is a crisis you cannot ignore running out of time Thomas!

Bernie Sanders Campaign Groupie Sex Diary

It's proven to be a passionate electoral season, and voters have…