Even More Specialized New Streaming Services!
PseudoGrammer
Streaming service that provides round the clock airings of tv shows and movies where you think to yourself, “Hmmm… wait a second… is that Kelsey Grammar?”, but then it turns out that it isn’t.
HBO MASK
More economically viable version of HBO MAX that can be shared on one television by the members of several households, but due to the pandemic, masks must be worn by all members while watching.
SweepsWeek
Nothing but endless scenes from the part of the movie where the characters suddenly take part in a montage, wherein they all work together to clean up a room / house / abandoned warehouse / amusement park, etc. Special emphasis is given to the character in the scene who entertains the others by pretending that a broom is a microphone stand or guitar.
BanJoan
How many tv shows and movies that feature both prominent banjo music and an acting performance by Joan Collins could possibly exist? We have no idea either, but make no mistake, they’re all now available and housed within this enticing new streaming service.
Central Perky
Enjoy watching reruns of Friends, but find it difficult to concentrate on the jokes and plots due to the distraction caused by the near-constant presence of Jennifer Anniston’s nipple bumps? Do you find yourself having to rewind scenes, even entice episodes, due to their hypnotic influence? Then this streaming service, which uses CGI to remove the distracting items, is most definitely for you! This service is endorsed by Ms. Anniston herself, who admits “I was young, and needed the money.”
Selleck-Select
Have you ever been watching a tv show or movie and thought to yourself, “This is okay, I guess… but sure would be a lot better if all of the characters were sporting a Tom
Selleck-style stache!” Then you’re in for a real treat with Selleck-Select! All of your favorite tv shows, movies, sporting events and steamy erotica, all with the extra added spice of Tom Selleck
mustaches digitally placed onto each and every character (and even an animal here and there)! And as a special new subscriber bonus, they’ll add Selleck staches to the wedding video or home
movie selection of your choosing (while supplies last)!
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Kit has been a regular contributor to MAD magazine for over ten years, and has also been regularly published by National Lampoon, Playboy, The American Bystander, Funny Or Die, SpongeBob Squarepants Comics, Points In Case and many others. His work has been called “sort of like ‘The Far Side’, but more offbeat and often much funnier” by people who should clearly know better. He lives with his wife and two dogs, all of whom do their best to tolerate his presence
