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Existential Baseball Calls
Out, but what does that mean? Sun interference, but you still blame yourself, Home run, but it still doesn’t leave you fulfilled. And more!
Entries by Janine Annett
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The Email Graveyard
95,000 LinkedIn updates, That article you’re going to read someday soon, Response to the email about setting up a playdate with a kid you don’t know, and more!
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How’s It Going? A F.A.Q.
Q: How’s it going? A: The standard answer “as well as can be excepted” applies, although this may fluctuate slightly on a day-to-day basis. Things that can influence how well things are going on any given day include exercising, sex (or lack thereof), looking at real estate listings, level of news consumption, and which of our national institutions are falling apart.
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Me Have Problem with Girl Scout Cookie Season
Me have legitimate problems. Me working on them. C is for Cookie, but also for Compulsive Eating. Me need to find new therapist that takes insurance.
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Wake Up, America!
ANCHOR 2: Our thoughts are with the victims and their families. ANCHOR 1: Thoughts. Prayers. ANCHOR 2: Yes, of course, thoughts and prayers. ANCHOR 1: And now: How to look like a celebrity, on a budget!
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Do Not Push the Red Button
Adviser 1: President Trump, there is a big, red button on your desk labeled “DO NOT PUSH”, but — Trump: I know. I see it. It’s a big, big red button. The best. I have the biggest, reddest button in the entire world. Adviser 1: Yes, you do. But I have to advise you NOT […]
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Jack Sprat Could Eat No Fat
Jack Sprat could eat no fat. He had high cholesterol, and his blood pressure also wasn’t doing him any favors. He was trying not to eat too much bacon. He was trying to eat more salads. He ate quinoa last week. Jack’s wife, Helen Sprat, could eat no lean. She was on a low […]