Please Complete This Brief Survey About Your Recent Elevator Ride
You recently took a ride in our elevator. Customer satisfaction is very important to us. Please help us by completing this five minute survey to tell us about your experience.
What was the main purpose of your elevator trip?
Business
Pleasure
Just taking a test drive
Get away from my spouse/roommate
Which answer best describes your experience riding this and other elevators?
This was my first time riding any elevator.
I have ridden elevators in the past, but this was my first ride in this elevator.
I have ridden this elevator a few times before.
I live or work in the building and have a season subscription to the elevator.
I live in this elevator.
Scheduling
When it came to scheduling your elevator ride, please select the statements that you agree with.
The button(s) were easy to find.
The button lit up brightly after I pressed it.
I felt confident the elevator was coming.
I did not have to wait long for the elevator to arrive.
The ads on the wall monitor had the right balance of relevance and eroticism.
Elevator Operator
If there was an elevator operator, please select the statements that you agree with.
The operator greeted me with a smile and a warm hello.
The operator understood my elevation needs.
The operator had the required knowledge and training to operate the elevator.
The operator communicated what would happen using clear, non-technical language.
The operator gossiped about people who live or work in the building.
The operator promoted conspiracy theories.
The operator used a slur the expected number of times.
The Ride
What phrase best describes the direction the elevator was traveling?
Going up
Going down
Side to side
When you read the option “Going down”, what was your reaction?
Turned on
Grossed out
Not sure what you mean
How did you feel when the elevator door opened on your floor?
Calm
Nervous
Nauseous
An urgent need to pee
Level achieved!
Unpleasant Events
Did you experience any of the following unpleasant events during your ride? Select all that apply.
Kid got in and pressed all the buttons
Lazy person took the elevator for just one floor
Elevator passed my destination floor several times in both directions.
Power outage
Awkward encounter with someone who has blocked me on social media
Fart
Groped by another passenger or by the operator
Fatal elevator crash
We are sorry you encountered someone who is blocking you on social media. What happened in your last interaction before they blocked you? Select all that apply.
I sent them a nude photo.
I tried to sell them a timeshare.
I insulted their looks and/or intelligence.
I expressed an opinion about the Israel-Palestine conflict.
Final Thoughts
How satisfied were you with your overall experience in the elevator?
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How likely are you to recommend this elevator to a friend or coworker?
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If this elevator had not been available, what other mode(s) of transportation would you have considered? Select all that apply.
A competitor’s elevator
Stairs
Rappel
Climb the building like Spiderman
If you have additional feedback about how we can improve your experience, please enter it below. Your feedback will remain anonymous because we promise not to read it.
We hope you enjoyed this survey. Please click the link below to share your survey experience and tell us how we did.
- About the Author
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I am a software engineer by day, comedy writer by night. New York transplant living in Silicon Valley. I write humorous skits, short stories and standup material.
