Survival Guide For Being Shipwrecked In An Episodic TV Series

Extreme Weather Will Be Infrequent and Cause Few Setbacks 

You’ll likely be lucky enough to get stranded on the only island on Earth that isn’t susceptible to tsunamis, hurricanes, or climate change at large. Your sandy beaches and shanty town made from your wreckage will remain as picturesque as ever. You actually have it better than your friends back home!

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Carefully Stockpile Your Limitless Resources

You crashed on this uncharted island without enough food, water, or power sources to last the rest of your lives. You’re worried you’re going to starve and be dehydrated, but soon you’ll be perfectly roasting a pig and bringing the leftovers back to your makeshift tent. Why? Who knows?! The important thing is delicious wild boar will keep showing up for you to eat regularly, and it will even play a major role in your storyline!

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Take A Break From The Doom and Gloom With Festive Holiday Celebrations

It doesn’t matter that no one in your group has access to a calendar to keep track of approaching holidays. If you follow the last two tips, you’ll just know. And as luck would have it, this island has a dense turkey population! Have your best ugly Christmas loincloth ready!

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Quickly Befriend The Guy Who Happens To Get Shipwrecked With Your Group When You Need His Skillset The Most

It’s important to remember that there’s no one right way to follow this tip as long as you follow it quickly. You can even pursue a romance if you’re feeling daring. But if you turn cold and distant from them, it’ll alienate you from the rest of the group and everyone will be much less sorry when you meet your abrupt death.

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Minimize Setbacks With Deus Ex Machina Solutions 

You’ve just contracted a deadly infection that is causing hysteria, several disgusting growths all over your body, and hallucinations set in suburban America. No hospital is nearby, and the member of your group with basic first-aid training has never seen anything like this. The important thing is that it’s very likely the most recent addition to your group already knows of a rare plant growing nearby that can be used to ensure you make a full recovery and that your friends don’t have to make any morally ambiguous decisions that could result in you growing as a person. You’ll be able to wake up the next morning as if nothing happened!

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Don’t Panic 

If you’ve followed all previous tips, especially number five, it will come in handy once your older self travels back in time to get you home earlier than they did. After your older self has done most of the heavy lifting, with the help of your new shipwreck friend who has risen in the ranks of your group more quickly than anyone who’s been there from the beginning, just know that the burden will then fall onto the people who will follow your story and be left asking, “That was it?”