Ladies, It’s Snack Time
PepsiCo CEO Indra Nooyi said in an interview last week that the company will be rolling out a line of products specifically targeted for women who want to “carry a snack in their purse.” In addition to crunchless Doritos, Pepsi is providing an exclusive preview of some of its other exciting new snack brands for today’s modern woman.
Niblets: Those Sweetgreen portion sizes are out of control–reach for these individually-wrapped salad bites when you get that arugula craving. Take some “you time” with Niblets!
Whistlestrips: Packaged in a gorgeous rose-gold tube, these bubblegum chews stick tightly to your teeth so you’re physically unable to respond to light-to-medium sexual harassment. Try a Whistlestrip next time your boss gets kind of weird!
UGoGirlz: Using the empty promises of late-stage capitalism, we air-pop yogurt bites for all the flavor with half the cals. Fuel up for that big presentation the smart way, girl 😉
ChunkaHunks: Alone at a bar waiting for your date--again? These chocolate dreamboats come in a clutch-sized pack so you can discreetly snack as he ghosts you. Taste a little naughtiness today!
Laydeeeez: These Goop-approved vegan treats (secret ingredients: ground avocado pits and turmeric!) come in an easy-to-slice roll that’s a breeze to throw into the oven before girls’ night. What else would your ladies want for the Bachelor viewing party?
Streem: Keep that bod rockin’ during cuffing season by choosing to snack on this film of leftover green smoothie residue. Things that taste terrible are good for you!
GloUps: We use the finest dried face mask shreds for an irresistible crunch and that she’s-got-it-all radiance. All-natural ingredients like honey, tea tree oil and aloe make them pretty safe to eat (we think LOL)!
Wine: It’s a little jug of wine!!!! For your purse!!!!!
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Molly Taft lives in New York City. Her writing has appeared in McSweeney’s, Buzzfeed, Splitsider, The Hairpin, and the Washington Post Magazine. By day, she writes about climate change; after hours, she works on her night cheese.
