Entries by Bridget Fitzgerald


originals

Most Affordable Memorial Day Weekend Getaways

Everyone you know is going somewhere this weekend. So if you’re a little tight but still want to do it right, here’s some very affordable – read: free as a takeout menu shoved under a door that never wanted no takeout menu – vacation ideas. Ooooh, yeahhhhh. That’s very nearly relaxing. Close Your Eyes And […]

originals

“Oh Crap! It’s Mother’s Day” 14 Last Minute Gift Ideas

Who has time to bake a cake? Little Debbie, that’s who. Social media your mother’s day. Sure, all the profile pics on Facebook are moms and kids in the 80s and 90s – but what about the driver’s license? Go to the DMV and get your MOM ID IRL #impossible #oneperphoto #theworditselfsaysimpossible #audreyhepburn Are you […]

originals

Time’s List Of 100 Most Influential Times

That Time When You Were Like I’ll Never Drink Again That Time You Drank Again That Time When You Wore Mismatched Socks On Purpose And Were Like, “This Is Who I Am Now.” That Time All The Chill Time Was Taken By Finding What To Watch On Netflix That Time You Listened To This Total […]

originals

8 Acts Weirder Than Hans Zimmer Playing Coachella

Think Hans Zimmer playing Lion King at Coachella this weekend is the weirdest mashup you’ve ever heard? Think again. Here are 8 other hot tickets no one would expect. Marilyn Manson Does The Super Bowl He sings his new hit, “America, The Beautiful People”. Tim Gunn on next “Fast And The Furious” It’s “The Fab […]

originals

Other People Mike Pence Won’t Dine With

Pence’s wife has announced that Mike Pence never dines with women alone. Here’s who else is on the no-fly list. 1. His Wife In A Mirror 2. Anyone Humming Whitney Houston Because You Are Not To Have One Woman, Let Alone “Every” 3. Even Half Of Dolly Parton 4. Jeffrey Tambour **Only On Shoot Days** […]

originals

Sports Illustrated: The Lesser Known Specialty Issues

Sure, you know the “Sports Illustrated: Swimsuit Edition”. But do you know some of their lesser-known specialty issues? The Dimly Lit Highway Edition These roads got curves you’ve never seen. The Exclusive Film Screening Edition This M. Night Shamylan movie’s got curves you’ve never seen! The 4:30 Issue This British high tea’s got one lump […]

originals

Grim Reaper’s 2016 Party Gets Outta Control

Looks like someone can’t get enough celebrating this year, and it’s the Grim Reaper. If you were in the 2016 bash of the season, you were at the Grim Reaper’s house. Here’s notes from his diary telling you what went down as his party got outta control!   10:00 – First guest? The Eagles’ Glenn […]

originals

10 Lesser Known Award Shows Nominees

Tis the season for award show nominees. Here are the few, the amazing – the lesser known nominees.   10. Chelsea Clinton  Best Supporting Daughter In An Election Year This is her third nomination. 9. Critics Who Voted For Alec Baldwin  Best Supporting No one had this Baldwin’s back like the Critics Choice Awards in […]

originals

Notes From Hillary’s Diary

For the next week leading up to the election, Hillary Clinton is pushing hard. Here’s a snippet of her diary entries so far this week.   Sunday 10/30 -Asked by a reporter what I’ll be for Halloween. I said President. He said, no, to dress up as. I said a stylish President. BOOM GOES THE […]

originals

Mike Pence’s Thoughts As The Plane Skidded Around

Republican Vice Presidential candidate Mike Pence was in a plane that skidded around New York’s LaGuardia Airport in rainy conditions Thursday afternoon shortly before landing safely. Here are his thoughts as he skidded around.   Who knew I’d be seated in a row with a Christian, a conservative, and a Republican. In that order.   […]

originals

The Upcoming Calendar Of Mr. Kenneth Bone

Ken Bone cares about America. If you think he’s just at the Town Hall for undecided voters, you may be wrong. The nicest man in America is also one of the busiest! Here’s a peek at his upcoming calendar.   10/20 @ 5:25-5:35 PM: Office Fire Safety Demonstration **please note: Ken Bone, Fire Safety Captain!! […]

originals

10 Other Things Ryan Lochte Also “Over Exaggerated”

After the Olympic games closed, Ryan Lochte’s mom discovered a wastepaper basket** full of other admissions from the Olympic swimmer who got into hot water. Here are some things he also “exaggerated.”   10) I’m sorry to all the Olympians I told that the medals had chocolate in the center so they’d all take pics […]