How To Tell If Your Gang Isn’t As Tough As You Think It Is…
You get a stern talking to if you go over ten dollars for your gang’s Secret Santa gift exchange.
Your gang’s bake sale gets mentioned in the church bulletin.
People come out of their homes to smile and wave when you do a drive-by.
The only drugs you sell are discounted cough drops bought in bulk from the dollar store.
The only ho’s you come into contact with are during the volunteer gardening your gang does for the local nursing home.
You’re married to your baby mama, and helping to pay for her to get through dental hygienist school.
Rather than killing a traitorous member of your gang, you decide instead to hug it out.
Your gang initiation involves a jarred jelly bean counting contest, as well as a potato sack race.
If you happen to notice the members of another gang wearing your gang colors, you compliment them on their bold and stylish fashion choices.
The undercover investigative documentary on your gang is only shown on the Hallmark Channel.
- About the Author
- Latest Posts
Kit has been a regular contributor to MAD magazine for over ten years, and has also been regularly published by National Lampoon, Playboy, The American Bystander, Funny Or Die, SpongeBob Squarepants Comics, Points In Case and many others. His work has been called “sort of like ‘The Far Side’, but more offbeat and often much funnier” by people who should clearly know better. He lives with his wife and two dogs, all of whom do their best to tolerate his presence
