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Other New Additions To Trump's Bible

Several books in this version of the Bible are presented Mad Libs style. Many more bits featuring Jesus hanging out with prostitutes. The Ten Commandments now officially designated as "fake news". And more!

The Church of Jesus Christ of Saints Who Are Always Running Late

“Have ye inquired of the Lord? He was supposed to be here two millennia ago.” - 1 Nephi 15:8

CARTOON: Garden of Eat'n

No brainer. Today's cartoon by Vaughan Tomlinson.

Debuting on Broadband: The Book of Zuckerberg 

Hello! My name is Elder Zuckerberg and I would like to share with you the most amazing update to my book. The good book. The Facebook. Not only can you follow your friends, but now, you can also follow God with the help of the new worship features available to you. That’s right, sinners. I brought God to Facebook so you can experience salvation.

CARTOON: Prohibited Produce

Don't even think about it, unless you have a coupon.

Trump's Other Photo-Op's You Might Have Missed

Trump used tear gas to clear peaceful protesters so he could have a photo op with a bible and a church. But there were other photo ops you might have missed!

Bachelor In Paradise Lost

I'm your host, Lucifer, and this is Bachelor In Paradise Lost!  Forget all of the pretenders to our throne, we're the real Temptation Island!

15 Potential Product Placements of Biblical Proportions #7 Could Get You to Convert

The Wailing Walmart, Virgin Mary Atlantic Airlines, The Three Wise Men’s Warehouse, and more.

Bible Version 2.0: Updated Verses from a God Who Just F'ing Can't Anymore

Ambien 5mg: So it shall be that we would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. Unto which the Lord replied "OMG, can’t I get 5 goddamned minutes to myself?! Daddy is TIRED.”

My Signed Book Collection

David Copperfield by Charles Dickens: Signed by The Amazing Johnathan at a Magic Convention in Las Vegas in 2005. The line for the real-life David Copperfield was super long, and I was getting hungry.

Groucho Marx: ‘I wouldn’t want to belong to a LinkedIn group that would have me as a member,’ and 11 Other Famous Quotes Updated for Millennials

Bible: Let he who is without sin podcast throwing the first stone Shakespeare’s…

What These 5 Jesus Quotes Would Look Like If We Changed “Shithole” to “Shithouse”

“Who invited us to this shithouse?” -         …

CARTOON: Professor Logical