What Trump Did Right During the Debate
Didn’t bite anyone.
(on-stage at least; and even Reagan took a nibble or two out of backstage lackeys prior to his debate with Mondale)
Didn’t use his fecal matter to draw a swastika on the front of his podium.
(I lost twenty bucks on that one)
Was close enough to Clinton to honk her boob, but didn’t.
(unconfirmed)
Provided a clear, concise, well thought-out overview of the problems facing our nation.
(Ha! Psyche! Just checking to see if you were paying attention.)
Despite his threats, did not leave genitals exposed during debate.
(editor’s note: our fact checkers tell us that this actually is untrue; the genitals were indeed exposed, but cameras were unable to pick them up successfully)
Didn’t trip on stage.
(tripping over own idiotic words doesn’t count in this context)
Let Hillary win the debate on purpose, as in his heart of hearts, he’s a chivalrous, decent guy.
Brought enough Skittles for everyone.
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Kit has been a regular contributor to MAD magazine for over ten years, and has also been regularly published by National Lampoon, Playboy, The American Bystander, Funny Or Die, SpongeBob Squarepants Comics, Points In Case and many others. His work has been called “sort of like ‘The Far Side’, but more offbeat and often much funnier” by people who should clearly know better. He lives with his wife and two dogs, all of whom do their best to tolerate his presence