You will be successful enough to pay your own phone bill.
You are always on time and three hours early for international flights.
You are deeply fulfilled by your non-doctor job.
You are enough, but I really liked that Jake guy.
You are giving all you have to offer and at least 10% to your 401(k).
You would really like this new HBO show. It has that Mark Ruffalo guy.
You create value in other people’s lives and debt in mine.
You surround yourself with great friends whose names I always forget.
Today is full of opportunities to send resumes out. Have you contacted my friend Jon on LinkedIn yet?
You are worthy of love from a financially stable Jewish man, like Jake.
Your drive and ambition allow you to achieve your goals of that playwriting thing you do.
You are blessed with an incredible family that you only visit during the holidays.
You are the architect of your own life, but not a real architect like your brother. Did he tell you about his promotion?
You trust yourself, but your dad knows a thing or two.
Your possibilities are endless. Hey, maybe Jake would take you back.
You are happy, right? Good.
- About the Author
- Latest Posts
Catherine Weingarten is a Brooklyn-based comedy writer who has written for such sites as Little Old Lady, Sally Magazine and Points in Case. She’s also a big fan of donuts existing!