originals

Bowling Green Massacre and Our All-Time Favorite Kellyanne Conway Lies

So now Kellyanne Conway is referring to a “Bowling Green Massacre”, which according to all news outlets, isn’t really even a thing. Kellyanne, you rascal!
This made us all warm and nostalgic for all of Kellyanne’s other ‘Alternative Facts’ over the past several months. Take our hand and join us for a sentimental walk down memory lane, won’t you?


Mitch McConnell Was People Magazine’s Sexiest Man of the Year in 2003.


Flakes of Trump’s skin psoriasis can rejuvenate a weakened potato crop if applied liberally.


Disco never died, and is fact is living a comfortable, if simple life, in the mountains of Venezuela.




She was really popular in high school, and her eleventh grade English teacher didn’t punch her as hard as she could in the stomach.


The rhythm method is a perfectly viable birth control solution, provided you’re under twenty-one and living in a rural area.


Scott Baio played Fonzi, NOT Chachi (she becomes visibly upset and confrontational for some reason whenever the subject of Chachi is broached).


Having a large pentagram tattooed onto her back is simply an eclectic fashion choice, and not as many have speculated, “a receptacle for the pooled seed of her dark lord”.


Trump won the election.