Other Notable Trysts that Quincy Jones Forgot to Mention in His Vulture Interview

Post Vulture interview, Quincy got a couple quick BJs from his drive-by girlfriends to clear his mind and instantly remembered a dozen other noteworthy sexcapades that he forgot to mention on the record. As part of his endeavor to establish himself as THE motherfucking soothsayer who definitely ain’t scurred (COME AT HIM BRO, SERIOUSLY JUST TRY), he’s released this carnal addendum of other groovy ass sex he’s aware of, just off the top of his head. He’s also pretty sure there’s more where this came from – hey, it was the 70s, man!

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1. Quincy Jones & Oprah (not bragging, just being honest)

 

2. Jimmy Carter & a couple of open-minded peanuts

 

3. Wilt Chamberlain & statistically probably your mom or one of your friends’ moms

 

4. Richard Gere & “that hamster” (confirmed)

 

5. Michael Jackson, Tito & Bubbles

 

6. Wilt Chamberlain & Marlon Brando

 

7. Starsky, Hutch & Leia’s left bun

 

8. The entire cast of M*A*S*H

 

9. Bono & a Joshua Tree (the rendezvous left him blind, but he’d still fuck a Joshua Tree any day of the week, especially bloody Sunday)

 

10. Wilt Chamberlain, Marlon Brando & your mom (Quincy’s pretty sure it was your mom)

 

11. Janis Joplin, Bobby McGee & a bag of marbles (everyone involved was very high, but it was clear the marbles initiated)

 

12. Wilt Chamberlain, Marlon Brando, your mom & Quincy Jones
    

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