Ways Giuliani Can Try to Earn the $148 Million…
Last week a federal court ordered Rudy Guiliani to pay $148 million to Georgian election workers he defamed. Since Mr. G does not have $148 million on hand, here are suggestions on how he can earn some big bucks.
Show up at conferences and threaten to talk unless people pay him to leave.
Sell off all his “America’s mayor” memorabilia from 9/11.
See if the LA Dodgers will sign him to a huge contract like they did that Ohtani guy.
Find a way to date T Swift.
Become a spokesman for the “Four Seasons”, the landscapers not that silly hotel chain.
Do commercials for Grecian Formula for men, “It won’t run like those others…”
Make a hit gross out buddy movie with Sacha Baron Cohen.
Star in the Suits spinoff. He’d be a natural with real world experience.
Launch a political consultant company where clients do the opposite of what he advises.
Audition for next season’s “Golden Bachelor”.
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John Zakour is a humor / sf/ fantasy writer with a Master’s degree in Human Behavior. He has written thousands of gags for syndicated comics, comedians and TV shows (including: Simpsons and Rugrats and, Joan River’s old TV show.) John has written seven humorous SF novels for Daw books (the first The Plutonium Blonde was named the funniest SF book of 2001 by The Chronicle of Science Fiction). John has also written thirteen YA books for smaller publishers. His Diary of a Super Girl Series is currently a top ten seller in class on amazon. He has also written four humorous self-help books and three books on HTML. John has also optioned three TV shows and four movies. John has been a contributor to Nickelodeon magazine writing Fairly Odd Parents, Rugrats and Jimmy Neutron comic books. John currently writes Bart Simpsons comics for Bongo comics.
