Rejected Netflix Dahmer Series Promotional Materials
The Netflix show Dahmer-Monster: The Jeffrey Dahmer Story has proven to be a huge hit for the network; but some viewers have found the show’s tone to be a bit insensitive and exploitative. Okay, sure, maybe. But giving credit where credit is due, at least they decided to refrain from releasing these horrid promotional items….
Jeffrey Dahmer: You Are Who You Eat cookbook
Malibu Dahmer’s Dream Beach House (cookware sold separately).
If You Can Read This, Jeffrey Dahmer Didn’t Eat Your Eyeballs bumper sticker.
Full-size human skull key ring.
Mouse-pad made partially of dried and cured human skin.
McDonald’s Dahmer Character Collectibles: They Look Good Enough To Eat!
PBS Finding Your Roots: The Ultimate Family Dinner.
iPhone protective case made from the teeth of nameless drifters.
Drink coasters that soak up lots of water, soda, or… um, y’know… other types of viscous liquids.
Dahmer soundtrack , featuring American Meat Pie, Dixie Chicken, Pour Some Sugar On Me, and more!!
Stay Calm And Dahmer t-shirt.
Scrote-Tote Bags, made from 60 % genuine scrotum.
Beyond Meat- “Tastes So Real It Could’ve Fooled Dahmer!”
Dahmer’s vegetarian surprise recipe (made totally from a vegetarian).
The Perfect Blend Is Coffee And Friends coffee mug.
Bed, Bath & The Great Beyond Dahmer Brand Cutlery
El Jeffy Peanut Butter & Julie
Face-mask that not only protects from viruses, but also the smells of decomposing flesh.
Paul Lander is not sure which he is proudest of — winning the Noble Peace Prize or sending, Congolese gynecologist, Dr. Denis Mukwege to accept it on his behalf, bringing to light the plight of African women in war torn countries. In his non-daydreaming hours, Paul has written for Weekly Humorist, National Lampoon, American Bystander, Huff Post Comedy, McSweeney’s, Bombeck Writers Workshop Blog, Humor Times, written and/or produced for multiple TV shows and written standup material that’s been performed on Maher, The Daily Show, Colbert, Kimmel, etc. Now, on to Paul’s time-commanding Special Forces in Khandahar…