Poople Magazine

100 Most Beautiful Poops, Plus 65 more Celeb BM's, Holy Sh%T! The Pope talks poop with Poople! Dropping A Deuce With Bruce; See Why He's Called The Boss, Yes Rock, We Smell What You're Cooking! Skid Marks The Spot! Name The Celebrity Based On Their Soiled Underpants. And more in this issue of Poople Magazine!

Lustler Magazine

Chick on Chick-fil-A: Porn Hub & Grub Hub Join Forces! VR vs AR: Can anything finally make you feel something? Anything? Let's Hear It For 69! (The Average Age Of Our Readers) and more in this issue of Lustler Magazine!

Popular Séance Magazine

Ouija Board Or Ouija Bored: How To Guarantee You Get A Spirited Spirit Every Time, and more in this issue of Popular Séance Magazine.

COMIC: Captain F#%cked Planet

Captain Planet is looking for a new planet to save, this one is cooked.

Feminist Anthems Rewritten to Accurately Promote Multi-Level Marketing Schemes  

“Girl, You’re Out of Funds” (Tune: “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun” by Cyndi Lauper) …Emailing, in the mornin’ light, / This work-from-home business has ruined your life./ A pyramid scam, an unfortunate one. / Oh, girl, you're out of funds… Oh, girl, you're out of funds…

QaDon's- American Bistro For American's Who Don't Like America

"Spend Your Independence Day Exerting Your Independence From American Values and Basic Human Decency With Our Special Fourth Of July Menu!!!" "Each of our meals is served on a paper replica of the Constitution, perfect for soaking up all of the gooey grease and spills!"

Renthouse Magazine

Full Frontal Or Back Door; How To Enter That Rental, Should The Carpets Match The Drapes? (Like design-wise, pervert) and more in Renthouse Magazine.

TV Snide

'Oh boy! More Streaming Services!? Maybe they could put them all together on one bill, oh wait, we had that and f*cked it up!' 'The Voice: Sorry, Folks, No Good Singers Left' and more in this issue of TV Snide!

Queasyriders Magazine

Riding My Hog, Sick As A Dog, Food Poisoning Or Real Poisoning; How To Tell If It Was Bad Shrimp Or Your Old Lady’s Trying To Kill You, and more in this issue of Queasyriders Magazine!

Little Debbie's Got A FAQ For You

We had to stop making the Zebra Cakes as it's becoming more and more difficult to get the chunks of real zebra that go into each cake. I guess they're close to being extinct or something? We'll probably need to rebrand at some point, although I'll admit that something like Horse Cakes doesn't sound quite as appetizing.

Bartha Steward Shiving

Time Off For Gouda Behavior, Adding A Splash Of Fall Medley To Your Gang's Colors, and more in this issue of Bartha Steward Shiving.

Frog and Toad are Doing Their Best (Book Excerpt)

Toad ponders a variety of questionable schemes to pay off his credit cards, while Frog spends too much time scrolling through the newsfeed on his phone. But despite their daily frustrations and existential concerns, they know that having a friend to share life’s burdens makes even the darkest days brighter.

VAXIM Magazine

Pharma Sutra: Can Pfizer Make You A "Riser"? Johnson & Johnson Into Your Johnson? And more!

WHO TED IT: Lasso or Nugent?

“As the man once said, the harder you work, the luckier you get.” “Every hateful statement ever made about me is a dirty lie.” And more!

Popular Romantic Comedies Rewritten for 2021

500 Days of Summer Might Convince People That Climate Change Is Real, There's Something About Mary That Makes You Think She’s the Kind of Person Who’d Fill Plastic Bags with Gasoline, Four Maskless Weddings That Led to at Least One Funeral, and more!

The Secret to Tom Hank’s Cool

Once Tom got a taste of anonymity and the police were looking for a suspect that didn’t exist, I had to keep creating new faces for him. It was a real challenge. Soon I he had to follow him around and do emergency make-up touch ups because of all the dirt, sweat, blood, and sometimes fire that would ruin the latex of his prosthetic face. One time he was robbing a bank and half the prosthetic almost melted off because of the SWAT Team’s flash grenades.

Teen Comedies For The Upcoming Post-Apocalyptic World

National Lampoon's Animal Cave: What sort of hijinx ensue when humans are forced to live in caves with wild animals? The animals eat the humans, we assume.

The Witch Demands a Retraction: Fairy Tale Reboots For Adults - [Book Excerpt]

Pinocchio Runs for Office, The Peeved Piper, Not So Snow White and so many more in this twisted collection of adult fairy tales! This hilarious collection of poems by Melissa Balmain puts a grown-up, contemporary spin on the stories and characters we all learned as children, from Little Red Riding Hood, to the Three Bears, the Pied Piper, and Cinderella; each delightfully depicted in full-color by Ron Barrett, (Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs) one of the best and award winning illustrators in the business. Now #1 in new releases on Amazon! Get your copy today!

Goodnight, Son: A Bedtime Story For Your Manchild

In the not-so-guest bedroom / There was a full-sized race car bed  / And my 398-month-old son tucked away, watching Beavis and Butthead 

Ramona Quimby, Age 48

“What does she mean ‘don’t be late?’” grumbled Ramona. Just because her older sister is in her fifties, Beezus thinks she’s so special. She’s always bragging about all the hormone replacement she gets to do, as if it’s some big deal or something. “I get hot flashes too,” Ramona groused.

Lost Dr. Seuss Book: Fox in Socks 2: A Descent Into Madness- Much Worse Then The Others!

If they're struggling with the drugs while they're chugging from a bottle, And they hide drugs up their buttholes just to get across the border, That's a druggy chugging wuggle buggle bottle butthole border struggle.

How the Mitch Stole Stimulus

Every Blue down in Blue-Ville loved stimulus a lot. But the Mitch who lived in the Senate of Blue Ville did not. The Mitch hated stimulus! The whole Covid season! Maybe because he believes socialism is treason. 

Goodbye Birds

But so long most of all, to the one we called regal. Goodbye to our very own proud bald eagle.

Plagueboy Magazine

This Month’s PlagueMate Will Have You Rising Quicker Than Current Virus Cases!

The Little Pence

From forbidden asteroids to dinners alone, take a journey with The Little Pence.

A Gaslight in the Attic

There’s a gaslight in the attic / Though the White House said one thing / They now deny and say another / And I think I’m going insane!