Unhelpful Clues Given to Me by Mindy Cohn During an October 1987 Taping of The $25,000 Pyramid Where the Category to Be Guessed Was “Things You Do on a Boat”
Scott Baio
Heave
Make certain Gary Coleman is sedated
Help yourself to the Pasta primavera in the cooler
Like all sorts of stuff
Retch
Rub some lotion on Ricky Schroeder
Uppers
Lob Jesus walking on water jabs at Kirk Cameron
Downers
Barf
Rummage through Valerie Bertinelli’s overnight bag
Wonder if Corey Feldman even owns a bathing suit
I guess float
Ralph Macchio
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Gary M. Almeter is an attorney who lives in a quaint and cozy neighborhood in Baltimore, MD with his wife, three children and beagle. His short stories, essays and humor pieces have appeared in McSweeney’s, Writer’s Bone, the Good Men Project, 1966, and Splitsider. He is the recipient of the Maryland Writer’s Association’s 2015 Creative Nonfiction Award. His first book “The Emperor of Ice-Cream” will be published in March 2019.
