COVID-19 Pickup Lines

Want to shelter in my place?

How about some Netflix-Hulu-AmazonPrimeVideo-HBONow-Disney+ and chill?

I have lots of toilet paper in my crib — and it’s three-ply.

You’re like this new virus. You take my breath away.

I worked with the TSA up until Tuesday. I have magical fingers.

Do you come here to panic buy often?

Is that a bottle of Purell in your pocket or are you happy to see me?

You’re hotter than my 108° fever.

Cough? What cough?

Flatten These Curves.

My name is Jared Leto and I just spent the last two weeks alone mediating in a desert.