Brexit Up Is Hard To Do

The Five Stages of Grief Following a Bad Break-Up / Planned Withdrawal

1) Denial– “I know that we’re leaving Europe, but we’re not really leaving leaving. We can still be friends, to start. And then, who knows? Maybe we can get together again some day. I feel like Europe will always be there for us, so if we change our mind later, we can just go back to the way things were.”

2) Anger– “Well, what did Europe expect? We were tired of being ignored and taken for granted!! They never really wanted us anyway, and initially voted against us attaining EC membership! Well, fuck that! We’ll be just fine on our own, you’ll see!! You’ll see!”

3) Bargaining– “Listen… no, just listen! Come on, come on… Look, maybe we can just share currency? On, like a limited-time basis? C’mon… just sit with me for a minute, and we can discuss reform negotiations… please?”

4) Depression– “Oh my God… leaving Europe is potentially going to cause the biggest financial depression that the United Kingdom has ever seen. Fuck. Fuckity fuckity fuck. What the hell were we thinking?”

5) Acceptance– “That was rough, but we feel much better now. Pretty soon, we might even be ready to see other countries. Canada seems nice, and is certainly very attractive.”