Other Ways That Trump Will Probably Try To Distract Us From The Pandemic

Trump has been doing everything that he can to distract us from the rising cases of the coronavirus, and his extremely poor handling of same. His clumsy maneuvers haven’t been working, but that doesn’t mean that he’s giving up. Oh no, far from it…

Other Ways That Trump Will Probably Try To Distract Us From The Pandemic

Campaign for the title of People magazine’s “Sexiest Dictator Of 2020”.

Enlist the assistance of the Satan-worshipping lizard people who dwell in the center of the earth, and ask them to get dirt on Joe Biden.

Finally release the hours of topless Ivanka sunbathing footage that he’s been accumulating over the years.

Go ahead and create the Trump Presidential Library, comprised entirely of the tell-all books about his horrible failings as a president and a human.

Have National Guard troops use violence and tear-gas to disperse protesters so that he can waddle across the street when he hears the ice cream truck heading his way.

Only agree to wear a face-mask if it features a reproduction of the confederate flag.

Join the KKK, but claim that it was only to get the Friends & Family discount at Cracker Barrel.

Play a few rounds of golf in the Arlington National Cemetery.

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Kit Lively

Kit has been a regular contributor to MAD magazine for over ten years, and has also been regularly published by National Lampoon, Playboy, The American Bystander, Funny Or Die, SpongeBob Squarepants Comics, Points In Case and many others. His work has been called “sort of like ‘The Far Side’, but more offbeat and often much funnier” by people who should clearly know better. He lives with his wife and two dogs, all of whom do their best to tolerate his presence

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