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Headlines From the Dominion / Fox News Trial We Will Never Get To See...

Fox Newscasters Arrive at Court Hearing Atop 4 Flying Horses, Swarm of Locusts Found on Sean Hannity During Pre Trial Security Screening, Judge Jeanine Pirro Appears Anxious, Uneasy In Presence of Real Judge, and more!

21 Voting Groups Now Vying for the Position Formerly Held By Soccer Moms 

Badminton Aunts, Pinball Wizards, Pickleball Playing Bros, and more!

CARTOON: Seedy Sources

Also President Trump is in amazing shape and smells tremendous. Today's cartoon by Paul Lander and Dan McConnell.

CARTOON: Crash Test Voting

Some surprising voter turn-out. Today's cartoon by Bob Eckstein.

The Most Reliable Alternatives to Mail-in Voting

Text your vote to American Idol. Host a ballot reveal party. And more!

My House has Been on Fire for the Past Four Years but I’m Still Undecided About Calling the Fire Department

Hey there, new neighbor! Sorry, I couldn’t hear you over the roaring blaze destroying my home. Have I decided if I should call the fire department or not? No, I haven’t, not yet at least. I still need more time. What am I waiting for? I’m not sure if they’ll make the state of my home any better. Yes, we’ve been running out of air and visibility for awhile now, but isn’t the fire department just as bad? 

CARTOONS: Wet Results

Rock the Moat. Today's cartoon by Dan Misdea.

CARTOON: USPS Streamlined Sorting

It's all about efficiency. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

People and Things I Would Rather Vote for Than Trump

The list is long, and repulsive, yet all much, much better options. Illustrated list by Jason Chatfield.

CARTOON: Blooming Prospects

Both crave attention. Today's cartoon by Bob Eckstein.

Meet Your New and Improved Elected Representatives!

Indicted for Campaign Corruption, Securities Fraud, Self-published Bigfoot Erotica and more fun from our elected officials!

SO, YOU VOTED. WELL, WHOOP-DE-DOO

When I was a kid, we couldn’t look up candidates on the internet. In fact, we didn’t even know who the candidates were, only that they all had gout. We used to just vote on whoever had least serious case of gout. That’s how Uncle Henry almost became Mayor in ’72. He wasn’t really my uncle. That was just a childhood nickname that stuck. Never did get to be mayor, though. Turned out he had a bad case of shrub pox that came on right before election day.

Republicans to Physically Flip When Your State Flips Republican

Your Coworker Make sure to use both hands to physically flip Nancy, a known Trump acolyte, on your way to the break room. Her surprisingly unstable ergonomic chair won’t stand a chance against your leftist rage—much like immigrants seeking asylum won’t stand a chance against her xenophobia.

CARTOON: Voter Turnout

When the best case scenario is the worst case scenario. Today's cartoon by Bob Eckstein.

Weekly Humorist Voting Tips

Once you've voted, please don't then call the voting location every fifteen minutes or so in an attempt to find out the results. The results will be shown later on TV. You remember how much you love your TV, right?

Why We’re Voting Red: Fairy Tale and Nursery Rhyme Characters Weigh in on the Midterm Elections

Grumpy Dwarf, 1035 yrs, Coal City, WV, Miner Coal is the future!

Thank You For Attending This Memorial Service, Please Vote On November 6th

  Thank you for joining us today at St. Ben’s as we honor…

Voter Pledge Card for the Liberal Elite

Perfect candidate isn’t running, maybe don't toss out your vote!

CARTOON: Honest Voter Stickers

"I Voted...because the sticker matches my sense of civic duty, and also my new fall coat." Today's cartoon by Ali Solomon.

Coffee is for Voters

You think this is abuse? You can't take this -- how can you take another term and a half of Trump? I can go out there in November with the candidates you got, make myself a new Senate Judiciary Committee. Can you? Can you? Go and do likewise! Get mad! Get mad!! You know what it takes to vote? You just have to be registered.

Sarah Huckabee Sanders Briefs the Media: “The President clearly meant you need id to buy groceries”

Before we start, I just want to note how disappointed I am in…

A Timeline of the Development of the Modern Democracy

  1294 B.C.E. – Egyptian scribes break the first-ever…

Election Day Voting Checklist

Are you ready to make the arduous journey to your local voting…