Our financial success during such times do not make these moments any less painful. We'd also like to underscore our significant contributions to charitable organizations and similar tax-deductible philanthropy.  To be clear — Murder Manifesto LLC stands united against violence and hatred. We will continue to reflect and pray to prevent such tragic events from occurring again.

May I remind you, the Second Amendment protects your right to Bear Arms, not snakes. Americans can still have as many Bear Arms as they want.

We are under attack! This is a crisis of epic proportions. Not since open floor plans became trendy has our industry been in this much danger of fading into obscurity. The ‘one entrance, one exit’ movement sweeping the nation is putting our entire sector at risk. If your livelihood depends on the fabrication, sale, and installation of doors, then this is no laughing matter.

Vote them out. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

I’m also sorry I mocked you for your food hoards – I’m sorry, I’m sorry, supply stores. I bet *you’re* not out of toilet paper, right? Ha, ha. I know I made fun of the fact that you’d cached so many Slim Jims, but a lot of what you had down there was of solid nutritional value. 

Getting ready for Trumper Dome. Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

Whelp, they’re at it again, folks. When will those infectious disease scientists at the so-called Center for Disease Control ever quit their fear-mongering and just do their jobs? Yes, a few of those giant rats Americans love keeping as pets have contracted an illness that’s made them prone to violent outbursts in which they occasionally tear the flesh off their owners’ faces, but these scientists are making it sound like that’s some out of control situation.

1. Replace PE, music, and art with paramilitary and situational…

The cast of “Duck Dynasty” announced, for all their fans…