Posts

Letters From The Frontlines Of The War On Christmas

Sweetheart, Went to a Target tonight. I was horrified to learn the nutcrackers have turned gay. Why must these Secularists sexualize everything? Put your nuts in its mouth like the rest of us and enjoy the birth of our Lord. Merry Christmas, Jim

Counting Down the Days Until the Election with My Donald Trump Advent Calendar

Concepts of plans. An 8x10 of Kim Jong-un signed by his secretary. $5 gift card to the Trump Store in Gatlinburg, TN. And more!

Other Things We Should be Controlling Instead of the Weather

Ghosts: I think we’re all tired hearing about ghosts and spooks and poltergeists running around haunting people and places.  There’s something the Deep State needs to take care of.

The Startling Decline of a Beloved Children’s Series

The Berenstain Bears' Say Their Prayers The Berenstain Bears' Want You to Say Your Prayers The Berenstain Bears' Reject the Devil’s Music The Berenstain Bears' Switch to Homeschooling And more!

CARTOON: Get Cracking

Hive Five. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

Ways To Make The Vice Presidential Debate More Entertaining…

Each nominee answers questions from a dunk tank seat. And more!

CARTOON: Debate Prep

Hold on tight. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

Why RFK Jr. Is Really Pulling out of the Election…

He’s got some bear meat he has to use FAST! And more!

Less Catchy Yet More Effective Derivatives of ‘MAGA’ to Lock Up the Election

MSDECA: Make Seats at Drinking Establishments Comfortable Again! The radical owners who run these places, they’re doing horrible—horrible!—things: aluminum stools with no cushions, no backs, no footrests. Stools without any of that or the ability to swivel. You can’t even swivel, folks. Not good.

CARTOON: Project 2025

Dystopian Dialogue. Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

I'd Much Rather Be Called Racist than Weird, So It's Time to Insult the Mixed-Race Vice President

I knew the whole “turn Black” thing was a winner. And demanding that someone “look into” Kamala’s ethnicity? That’s some 2015-era birtherism right there. Tried and true. And viola. We’re back in business, baby.

When Trump Told People They’d Never Have to Vote Again, He Wasn’t Threatening Democracy. He Was Working out Material for a Tight 5 at the Copa

Did Trump say he was going to be “a dictator on day one” only a few months ago? Sure, he did. When he says his opponents are “vermin” who need to be “rooted out,” he’s definitely not echoing fascist rhetoric from Italy and Germany in the 1930s. He’s just testing out his latest Benito Mussolini impression before his residency at the Palm.  

SNL Should Bring Back That Cast Member from 15 Years Ago to Play a Current Public Figure

We all remember how much we loved it when that cast member was on the show. I’m sure that person is totally available, and would love to drop everything they’re doing to fly across the country/globe from wherever their current project is filming and give up the majority of their weekends from October through May to appear in an SNL cold open. Each week, they could deliver us a forever-memorable topical sketch where they stand behind a plexiglass podium or sit behind a foam-core Resolute Desk and deliver setup/punchline two-liners about whatever Republicans or pop stars did over the past six days.

"My Father Is A Good Man...But He Is Unfit To Lead,” by a 7-Year-Old

Look, we all love my dad. But this is not the my dad of 3 years ago, who chased that family of mice out of our grill, saving the 4th of July barbecue. This is not the my dad of 2 years ago, who successfully Heimliched our dog after she ate my sister’s 3-D Magna-Tiles. This is the my dad of 2024. 

CARTOON: Political Ponderings

Inward Decay vs. Outward Demise. Today's cartoon by Jason Bentsman & Matt Saks.

The Ten Commandments Revised for Louisiana Public Schools

You shall not steal. Unless you’re stealing your ideals for governing from autocratic oligarchs. In that case, be our guest. 

Team Trump Online Memes Updates

Godzilla: Hey, when you think about destroying a corrupt town like Washington D.C., what comes to mind quicker than Godzilla?  Imagine Prez Trump’s head over Godzilla’s as he stomps through town screaming “MAGA” or “Sleepy Joe!” (depending on focus group feedback) and we can turn the fleeing populous into members of the Demon-cratic Party (pretty good, right? I just made that up now). I think we can use video from January 6th.  There’s a lot of footage there.

Other Trump Stories Killed By The National Enquirer

Trump Takes Pet Rock To Baseball Game Instead Of Eric, Ranch Dressing Fountains Placed Into Trump Apartment Bathrooms, And more!

Why Are The Trump Jurors Being Excused?

Preferred Schwarzenegger on The Apprentice. Appears to be an actual Christian, rather than a Trump Christian. Elderly man with full head of hair and a naturally healthy complexion. And more!

Donald Trump’s Totally Untrue and Fabricated Random Acts of Kindness

I was at the zoo. There was a baby rhino that wouldn’t drink its milk. None of the zookeepers were having any luck. Suddenly, a man emerged from the crowd that had formed. “Mind if I give it a shot?” It was Donald. He asked if I would hold his jacket as he climbed over the fence. He took that baby rhino, cradled it in his arms, and put the bottle in its mouth. As the rhino suckled, Donald caressed its head, and I could faintly hear him whisper, “It’s going to be okay, sweet one.”

Who Gets What in the Divorce of America

MAGA gets: Wal Mart  Everyone else gets: Target // MAGA gets:  Book burning. Everyone else gets:  Burning carbs. And more!

A Letter from Someone Who Wants to Keep a Confederate Statue Up Solely Because That’s Where He Lost His Virginity

Once ol’ General Jackson is no longer standing in the park, where will I point to when I want to recount to people the greatest night of my life? How will I explain to my son where his old man received his first ever sloppy toppy?

Inside Sedition and 8 Other Potential Ronna McDaniel’s Fox News Shows

Inside Sedition, Fox and No Friends, Big Steal or No Big Steal, and more!

I’m Katie Britt’s Kitchen Table, and Let Me Tell You – This Bitch Is Crazy

Well, well, well, it seems I’ve finally gotten my 17ish minutes of fame, hovering juuuust at the bottom of the frame while ol’ Mama Bear vocal-fried up a hot platter of American Carnage Lite for the public. And let me tell you, as the surface upon which Katie has served that dinner she worries about at 2am for longer than I like to admit: what you all saw tonight is just the tip of the straitjacket. 

MAGAts- Your Guide To Trump Loving Right Wing Extremists

Tessie Tickles: Host of the right wing podcast Tessie Gets Messy, which is less a talk show than a series of racist and /or homophobic diatribes.    So kind of like FOX News if it were broadcast from the poorly lit back porch of a lime green trailer. 

Why Nikki Haley Is Only “Suspending” Her Campaign for President

She has 91 less criminal charges than Trump does. If by some miracle one of them actually lands him in jail she might then become the front runner. And more!

GOPlayer One Go!

CPAC-Man: You're CPAC-Man, darting around the maze-like corridors of CPAC, gobbling up donor funds and seedy political favors while also trying to avoid Nazis who have made themselves cozy at the convention.    Keep an eye out for those guys, they're sneaky; before you know it photos of you standing right next to a Nazi salute could be a trending story on MSNBC, which could end your game!    Ah, who're we kidding?   No one on the conservative side will care about that kind of thing anyway.   This game has endless lives.

How Nikki Haley Could Revive Her Failing Presidential Campaign

How did it happen, America? The 2024 presidential election is getting closer and closer, and somehow, the presumptive nominees are the same two melted goblins who ran against each other in 2020. WE HAD FOUR YEARS TO FIND BETTER PEOPLE! AND WE STILL DIDN'T DO IT!

Beauty Tips for Attracting a Republican Man

Go blonde. No, blonder. This one should be obvious, but we’re gonna go full Patrick Bateman on you here because we cannot stress “blonde” enough. Even if you’re one of God’s chosen few who possess natural blonde locks, you could still probably use the assistance of dye. There’s no such thing as too yellow or too platinum. Our boys love their towheads, and who can blame them? (Just don’t go too far into full-on white because then you’ll look old and, ew, gross, who wants to date that?)

CARTOON: Republican Final Jeopardy

Another one bites the dust. Today's cartoon by Lars Kenseth.

Why George Santos Doesn’t Mind Being Expelled From Congress

He’s now free to become King of England, a job that pays better and works less than a congressman. He really doesn’t lie enough to be a politician. And more!

GAG A MAGA!  Down N' Dirty Details Of The Most Recent Trump Gag Order

No more mentions of a "witch hunt", as many Trump followers believe in actual witches, and the continued repetition of the phrase really frightens them.

CARTOON: IndictMINTS

Now on every MyPillow guy Pillow! Today's cartoon by Paul Lander & Dan McConnell.

CARTOON: Mugshot Masterpiece

Presidential Power to Mugshot Hour. Today's cartoon by Brandon Kicks.

I'm the Republican Who's Going to Beat Donald Trump and- Oh No I Just Shit My Pants

This country desperately needs Trumpism without Trump. And I am not Trump. No, I'm- shitting my pants again! Oh no! Hnnnn! Hnnnnnnnnnnnn! Ew, my pants are full of shit! Why is this happening? I'm just trying to say and do everything Donald Trump would while looking and sounding more Presidential! Hhhnn! Oh God I'm shitting more- Hhhhhhhnnnnnnn! The shit's coming out of the bottom of my pants now!

Breakfast At Tiffany’s

Ah, evidence is like an engagement party held at Waffle House: it only works when poor people are involved.

CARTOON: Woke Up

Quick close your eyes! Today's cartoon by Patrick Hickey.

CARTOON: Fundsinking

Putting the 'ass' in classified. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

Op-Ed: I’m the Alien Controlling Mike Pence from Inside His Skull–Farewell, Earth 

I understand the grief many of you might feel now that you know the truth about Michael. Some of you loved him. Others despised him. But please, accept this: there is no “Mike Pence.” Michael was never real...

Truly Terrible Congressional Cost Cutting Measures

Less expensive prostitutes for out-of- town conferences. Congress looking into ways of potentially harvesting the energy created by massive book burnings. And more!

GOP Updated & Approved Versions Of Popular Literature

Cujo: The love and kindness of a gentle St. Bernard dog is just what's needed to bring together a family struggling with undisclosed personal issues.

Some Possible New Jobs for Tucker Carlson

GOP diversity consultant, Melting wax figure of Tucker Carlson, Busboy at Trump Grill, and more!

The Bullshit Artist

George Santos, as we know, is also an international film star, he and his co-star Kitara Ravache, are up for an Oscar in the new film, The Bullshit Artist'! It's remarkable, with his animal charity work, elected office, and work as a eyewear model, that he finds the time to do it all! Fingers crossed!

Student Loan Acceptance: A Solution Brought to You By the Grand Old Party

Allow us, your humble allies in this pursuit of equality, to present a couple steps, also known as the Five Stages of Grief, to help you navigate and ultimately accept the overwhelming heartache that comes with knowing 19% of all your paychecks will be forfeit to your student loans as long as you draw breath.

21 Voting Groups Now Vying for the Position Formerly Held By Soccer Moms 

Badminton Aunts, Pinball Wizards, Pickleball Playing Bros, and more!

Letter of Apology from George Santos

Did I make a few fibs about my income along the way? Maybe. It’s not entirely my fault, though. There was that thing at Maya Angelou’s annual solstice party when I thought Sting had asked me, “Are you South American?” To which I answered, “Brazilian”. But what he actually said was, “How much money did you make in 2008?”, and he thought I said, “A bazillion”. An honest mistake, and I realized later but didn’t want to correct him. I mean, it’s Sting.

Free Titles For Your Right-Wing Memoir

'Cancel Cancel Culture: Canceling Cancelation', 'Me First and You Maybe', 'My Pride and My Prejudice', and more!

As the Mechanic Who Changed Your Tires, if the Car Goes 100 Mph I’ll Take All the Credit, but if the Wheels Fall Off You Can’t Blame Me

I’m not saying the wheels are going to fly off your car, but I’m also not saying that. You can’t blame me that Jimmy’s mom Susan came in wearing a new blouse from Kohl’s and I got a little distracted. She just got out of the hospital last week. Looking real fine for 97.

The Republican Emperors Hereby Present You With An Opportunity To Become Esteemed Gladiators 

We’re not kidnapping you, and we’re not forcing you to fight against your will. You aren’t pawns in some elaborate game... You are prized gladiator fighters– royalty even! As proof, here’s a gift card to McDonald's, and some armor we’ve crafted out of recycled Diet Coke cans.

Inventory List Of The FBI's Raid Of Trump

Secret identity of Q (it's Tony Danza!!) McDonalds' Grimace life size sex doll, Trump steaks made of real Trump! (mostly his mother) And more!

CARTOON: Dog Daze

Just scratching the surface. Today's cartoon by Steve Daugherty.

CARTOON: Nosey

Don't sneeze. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

Zillow Listing for Ted Cruz’s Special Place in Hell

Why have more than one door when you’ll never leave? This is the paradise you thought was only for other people! Every exquisite feature of this bespoke property reflects your public record. Constructed by Unhallowed Homes and occasionally materializing near Cancun...

CARTOON: GOP in the Room

Vote them out. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

#RightWingKidShows

The Magic School-Choice Bus, Captain F The Planet, Blue's Coups, and more #RightWingKidShows on this week's trending joke game!

CARTOON: Downhill

Some bad news...Today's cartoon by Bob Eckstein.

CARTOON: Muzzled Mocking

Opted Out. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Trump Recycling

Just Shredful. Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

Welcome to the Manchin-Sinema Diner.  I’m Todd, and I’ll Be Your Stonewaller This Evening

See, the owners, Joe and Kyrsten, have a real vision for this place.  They want it to appear to be a fully functioning restaurant, and bring in as many desperate customers as possible.  At the same time, they’re working with a conglomerate based in Qatar that plans to raze this building to the ground and replace it with a parking lot that’s convenient to absolutely nothing. 

CARTOON: Trump's Tell-All

Orange Juice is loose. Today's cartoon by Dave Whamond.

CARTOON: Post Trump Infrastructure Repair

Build it back stronger. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

The Witch Demands a Retraction: Fairy Tale Reboots For Adults - [Book Excerpt]

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Pinocchio Runs for Office, The Peeved Piper, Not So Snow White and so many more in this twisted collection of adult fairy tales! This hilarious collection of poems by Melissa Balmain puts a grown-up, contemporary spin on the stories and characters we all learned as children, from Little Red Riding Hood, to the Three Bears, the Pied Piper, and Cinderella; each delightfully depicted in full-color by Ron Barrett, (Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs) one of the best and award winning illustrators in the business. Now #1 in new releases on Amazon! Get your copy today!

#ConservativeKidsCartoons

Dudley Do AltRight, Paw Patrol Lives Matter, Inspect Her Gadget. and more #ConservativeKidsCartoons on this week's trending joke game!

CARTOON: Old Normal

The other virus is back. Today's cartoon by Joe Wos.

I Wasn’t Concerned When A Stampede Of Raging Bulls Broke Into The Porcelain Shop Where I Work

Now, if the tables had been turned and the bulls were a herd of dairy cows, I might have been concerned. You know how dangerous those Jersey cows can be. Very concerning. No, they don’t behave the same as a bull or have the horns, but they are definitely more dangerous. I hate to think what could have happened if they’d been the cattle that had come to our shop. It would have been an “udder” disaster.

Q & Anon- Top Questions From QAnon's Website FAQ

Q: Is wiping front to back is the work of Satan and his minions (ie, Liberals). A: If you're wiping at all, you're several steps ahead than the vast majority of our members.

Unsurprising Revelations From Trump's 2nd Impeachment Trial

Trump enjoyed the scenes of destruction so much that he recorded over his VHS tape of sex with Stormy Daniels in order to preserve the footage.

CARTOON: Impeachment Defense Team's Arsenal

Also the classic 'I Know You Are But What Am I." Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: New Trump Twitter

Anti-social Media. Today's cartoon by Dave Whamond.

CARTOON: Free & Clear

Also steal as many supplies as you want. Today's cartoon by Ali Solomon.

Sorry! These 5 Beloved Children Show Characters Grew Up To Be Republicans 

Caillou from Caillou: Is this one really a surprise? Caillou is entitled, bratty, and viewed as a negative influence on children. It’s no shock that he grew up to become a Republican. He throws temper tantrums to get his way and is never punished for his actions. Caillou definitely stormed the Capitol.

Other Crazy QAnon Conspiracy Theories

Wearing a necklace of gluten around your neck will ward off Democrats. Socialists hold wet t-shirt contents using the tears of Jesus. And more!

Other Face Masks in Marjorie Taylor Greene’s Collection

'This is Orwellian', 'What Does Orwellian Mean?', 'No Really, Can Someone Explain It?' And more!

Names for Trump’s New Political Party

Mein Pillow, Trump’s Chumps, Turd Reich, and more!

CARTOON: Gotcha!

Can't take a little joke? Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

The Republican Twilight Zone

There is another dimension beyond all logic known to man. It is a dimension of arrogance as vast as space and as bottomless as voter fraud allegations. It is the middle ground between Mike Pence and Kelly Anne Conway, between science fiction and Trump Tweets. It lies between the pit of man's fears and the summit of man’s maskless indoor gatherings. It is an area which we call... The Republican Zone.

CARTOON: Read Between The Lines

Decoding. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Horny Politics

Times they are a changing. Today's cartoon by Mat Barton & Adam Cooper.

CARTOON: Burning Question

Could get much better!? HAHAHAHA. Not! Today's cartoon by Ali Solomon.

Why I, A Rat, Won’t Tolerate One More Day on This Sinking Ship

And here we are. I don’t like to use the word hero (though I’m sure I will, many times, when I write my memoirs). I’m just a simple rat who knows right for wrong when I see it. And then, someday, after years of consideration, I finally choose to listen to the searing fires of my burning conscience. It’s what any good, patriotic rat would do.

CARTOON: Riot Geared

How embarrassing. Extra feather? Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

Punishing Trump With AddenDUMBS To The 25th Amendment

25 B-7: Trump forced to live in a run-down condo with son Eric as a roommate, for a minimum of no less than seven years. 25 J-7: Louie Anderson to portray Trump in any / all future tell-all movies (this will drive Trump crazy!!). 25 N-2: The McRib? Gone forever, never to return. And more!

CARTOON: ASSterisk President

Definition of Sedition. Today's cartoon by Brandon Hicks.

Revised Lyrics to "Midnight Train to Georgia"

So, he called up some folks / (Wooh, wooh, wooh-wooh) / And asked for thousands more votes / (Wooh, wooh, wooh-wooh) / Scheming for a way to get back, to the life he once knew / Oh, yes he did, he said he would / Oh-oh, he’s cheating (Cheating)

Quiz: Trump Pardon/Not A Trump Pardon

1. Boris and Natasha (Espionage, Attempted kidnapping of Moose and Squirrel) 2. Charles Manson (Cult Leader) 3. Susan B Anthony (Resisting Arrest) and more!

Fired and 14 Other Potential Magazine Covers for Trump

Creeple, Trolling Stoned, Poor Sports Illustrated, and more!

Memo from the Office of the Vice Chancellor of the Lizard Overlord Project to the Costuming Department

And what is going on with Bill Barr’s facial unit?  The prototype we were shown had a full range of mobility and expression.  The unit in the field now has become the target of ridicule and given rise to unwelcome notoriety through slurs like “Resting Bill Barr Face” and “Attorney General Grumpy Cat”.

CARTOON: Criminal Insurance

I'll make less of a mess. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

Trump Turkey Pardon

We just need a signature here, here and here....everything will be taken care of, and then the turkey and his family will be in no way held liable for any crimes past or present. But if there's any room for disagreement, I may be willing to haggle regarding a member or two of the turkey's family. Like the turkey's sons, just as one example.

CARTOON: Pardon Me?

Get stuffed. Today's cartoon by Andrew Dicus.

CARTOON: Futile

Why don't you make like a tree, and get outta here. Today's cartoon by David Ostow.

What to Do When Your Screaming Autocrat Won’t Leave the White House

Offer a choice. This will make him feel like he has some say in the matter, even though he doesn’t. “On the way home, do you want us to keep counting the votes in Pennsylvania or stop counting them?”

CARTOON: Just A Flesh Wound

I'll bite your ankles! Today's cartoon by Tom Chitty.

CARTOON: Senate Tales!

Our American JUST US System In Action! Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Elephant in the Room

The elephant in the room. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Scariest Decorations

Terrifying. Today's cartoon by David Ostow.

Weekly Humorist's Election Season Forecast Calendar

Thursday, October 15- Following the previous evening's debate, Trump voters decide to finally being wearing masks, but due to embarrassment rather than pandemic concerns.

CARTOON: Mitch's Simple Rules

Consistent government is our best chance. Today's cartoon by David Ostow.

CARTOON: Whodunit?

Need a clue? Today's cartoon by Tom Chitty.

Updated Classics That Reflect Our Current Times

A Tale Of Two CDCs, Pride & Prejudiced President, Nasty Little Women, and more!

CARTOON: GOP Venues

Maybe stay for a while. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: The Hoax With The Most

You should have seen the cheery tree. It was so mean to me. Today's cartoon by Lance Hansen.

CARTOON: Signed Out

Some leave their mark with positive action, others...Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Dr. Fauci's Cure-All

Maybe a few more over the mouth to be safe. Today's cartoon by Bob Eckstein.

Sample Scripts for the Elizabeth Warren Drunken Recrimination Phone Bank

You’ve indicated in the past that you’d be happy to vote for a woman, you just “weren’t that into” Hillary Clinton. And yet you’ve voiced concerns that Elizabeth Warren just isn’t “electable.” What does “electable” mean to you?

CARTOON: Impeachment Recap

A very simple guide to the downfall of our great republic. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Frosty Testimony

Melting Defenses. Today's catoon by Bob Eckstein and Paul Lander.

CARTOON: Hard of Hearings?

Skip to the good parts. Today's cartoon by Ali Solomon.

CARTOON: Pre-colored

Totally, Fantastic, White House approved. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Trump's Legal Dream Team

We rest our case....for being awesome. Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

CARTOON: Happy Tune

Whistle a happy tune. This song is PERFECT, TREMENDOUS. THE BEST! Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Trump Mints

Do Not Disturb?? Too late! Today's cartoon by Paul Lander and Dan McConnell.

CARTOON: View Askew

Open your eyes. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Rejected GOP Impeachment Comparisons

Republicans compared Trump's impeachment to Jesus and Pearl Harbor. Here's what didn't make the cut. Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Impeachment Series

Does the winner or loser end up in pinstripes? Today's cartoon by Michael Shaw.

CARTOON: Congressional Hearing Aid

Can you hearing me now? Today's cartoon by Michael Shaw.

Don't Separate Church & State! Sexy Religious Texts Conservative Senators Can Send Their Mistresses

Remind your lover that you’re an all around great guy/gal. So great, that you can be shared among many who are blessed with your presence and chemically-brightened smile.

CARTOON: Drastic Measures

Unthinkable! Today's cartoon by David DeGrand and Rob Kutner.

CARTOON: Discerning Depths

Sinking feeling? Today's cartoon by Peter Kuper.

CARTOON: Bolton Bolts

Let's get bombed. Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

Some Other Pieces of Americana, Revised By The Trump Administration

God Bless America: Written by Irving Berlin, Revised by President Trump “God, bless America, / Land that I love. / Although Baltimore is a real rat-infested hell.”

CARTOON: Locked and Loaded

Getting ready for Trumper Dome. Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

CARTOON: Uncontrollable

Uncontrollably scripted! Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

CARTOON: Human Lie Detector

Robo-Mueller, today's cartoon by Marty Dundics

Ways to Refer to a Thing Someone Said Without Actually Calling it Racist

Intolerant, Undertolerant, Tolerance averse, Possessing a mild allergy to tolerance and more.

CARTOON: Debatable

Debatable demo. Today's cartoon by Kit Lively and David DeGrand.

CARTOON: Huckzilla

Huckzilla heads home. Today's cartoon by Bob Eckstein.

CARTOON: Disaster Relief

Can we get Presidential Disaster Relief? Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

CARTOON: Trump Taxes

Seems like he really, really, really doesn't want anyone seeing these taxes, right? Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

CARTOON: TrumpCrow

Repel and replace. Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

CARTOON: TrumpCare

Gotta keep the tweeter healthy. Today's cartoon by Kit Lively and David DeGrand.

CARTOON: Trumpcare

Just a few more aaaaand we've solved it. Today's cartoon by Bob Eckstein.

CARTOON: Barred Mueller Report

Barr totally read the Mueller Report, so you don't have to. Like CliffsNotes! Stop asking so many questions. Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

CARTOON: Real March Madness

Which Cinderella story is making it all the way...to the final downfall? Click to see the full bracket! Today's cartoon by Bob Eckstein.

Things About Beto That Bother Trump (Even More Than The Wild Hand Gestures)

That wife of his sure seems to like him an awful lot. Very suspicious...

CARTOON: Running

Throwing tiny hat with a squirty flower in the ring. Today's cartoon by Bob Eckstein.

What You May Have Missed During The Michael Cohen Testimony

Cohen wasn't stymied by any of the questions, but rather simply distracted by the "Dress Your Own Baked Potato" bar that was being set up just off camera.

A Stalker Murders Me (A Story Composed from Presidential Campaign Fundraising Emails)

I am frustrated and angry today This is a crisis you cannot ignore running out of time Thomas!

CARTOON: The Wall

The Wall, signed, sealed & delivered. (If you play it backwards, it also can't believe Trump is president! ) Today's cartoon by David DeGrand.

Please Review the GOP-Approved Activities for Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

The following represents all of the GOP-approved activities relating to Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. In light of the recent dancing video, please take time to review this list.

CARTOON: Wall Funding

CARTOON: Emoluments Claus

I want to make money from all of this. Can you pay me too? Today's cartoon by J.C. Duffy.

CARTOON: Trump Cover

Donald was pissed that he wasn't the Person of the Year for TIME Magazine. But another publication made him Person of the Century! Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.

CARTOON: Trump's Number 1!

Everyone knows Trump is "Individual-1." Mueller really lets him know! Today's cartoon by Ivan Ehlers.